8 Essentials to Keep Your Relationship Vibrant and Healthy

1. Values. What are your values? What is most important to each of you? List your top three values independently and then come together to share your results. Where is the overlap? How can you support your loved one by understanding what they value most?
2. Voice. How are you communicating? Do you need a skill refresher to help you feel heard? Do you use active and reflective listening? Do you feel comfortable with your conflict resolution skills? Do you practice open communication and collaboration around tough issues like finances, parenting, extended family, and sex?
3. Vision. What do you want in life? What do you envision for the relationship? Individually, draw a picture or write about your dreams for the present and future. Share your visions. What do you want to work towards as a couple? Where do you see yourselves in a year? Five years?
4. Vows. What can you promise? What are you willing to do to align your values and vision? Vows do not have to be a one-time marital exchange. Couples are wise to examine and exchange vows yearly, monthly, and even daily.
5. Vacation. When can you schedule time away as a couple? Time away together, even for an overnight, is essential to healthy relationships. Plan dates that give you both a break from kids, caretaking, and work. Shared adventures and opportunities to rest and reset help couples make memories and renew shared interests.
6. Vulnerability. How honest and open are you willing to be about your needs, desires, hopes, and fears? How deeply have you explored your past? How does past imprinting or trauma continue to show up in your relationship when you are stressed or emotionally triggered? How well do you identify, experience, and express emotion?
7. Vitality. What brings you joy? What makes you feel most alive as a couple? What hobbies do you want to start or continue together? How satisfying is your sex life? Do you laugh and share inside jokes? Are you interested in learning something new together? How can you increase your relationship vitality?
8. Volunteer. How do you give back? How can you volunteer and serve others together? Studies indicate that volunteering and emotional well-being correlate positively (Lawton et al., 2020).

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Reflection:

Do you engage in these 8 essentials? Which ones are you looking forward to improve on?

#Relationships #Communication #Growth

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