Boyfriend never says no to family
I just need some outside perspectives. I have been dating a man for a year now and we recently had an issue . He is very close with his family . He lives with his dad and sees his mom and sister and her kids a few times a week. They come over every Saturday afternoon and stay a good portion of the day . He also goes out to dinner with his aunt and mom every Friday evening. He is always helping them. He sees me after he sees them on Friday or Saturday night. Last night we had plans but he canceled on me because they decided to stay late and he didn’t want me to wait around for him. I got annoyed and asked why he did not tell them we had plans. He told me could not tell them no. And that I was being dramatic and whiny for being upset with him. I didn’t see him last weekend because he went away with them to the beach. I am just worried that this is going to be an ongoing thing. He canceled a lot in the beginning of the relationship for them but has been really consistent with me this past spring and summer. I seriously thought we were passed that. We talk about marriage and kids but I don’t know if I can be with a guy who constantly puts his family before me. I feel like I get whatever scraps he has left. Am I wrong to feel this way? Did I overreact by getting frustrated with him last night? We are in our early , mid 30s.
@sabrinak111
Why are you not included with family? if you are at a point serious of talking of marriage? you do not only marry him but you are now joining a family your kids if you have them will be genetically linked starting on the defense with them is not all forgive and forget .... if you did not get time with him that would have been solved if you attended dinner with family of at least some hang out time.
In a close family you need to find a way to fit in as otherwise it will always be them or me situation. how is your relationship with your family? Is he included ? if you are NOT close to yours could it be you just feel he should not be anymore with his?
these questions are for you to ponder not expecting any answer but seems liek there is some adjustment and decisions about how this will proceed.
No we really don’t have much communication with each other’s families. I am close to mine , no problems on that front. Mine is always welcoming to him. Honestly don’t know how his family feels about me. I do agree I need to ask him why I am typically excluded from his family time. Makes me feel like he isn’t really that serious about me . Thank you for your response.
@sabrinak111
I hope you find your answer. i just think if you as a couple are talking long term you should be included in his family time.
Thank you! I agree with you,