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User Profile: LTBama
LTBama July 3rd, 2025

I’m looking for some optimism from someone that has experienced this before. So the girl I am in love with feels like she has lost the ability to fall in love with me again because of past trauma. She makes statements like I’m afraid it’s impossible and things like that. It almost always a statement of uncertainty. She doesn’t act completely closed off all the time. Only here and there does she talk in absolutes. And I just want to see if anyone has been in her spot and came out on the other side. I desperately need a little hope.

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User Profile: toughTiger6481
toughTiger6481 July 3rd, 2025

@LTBama

I find people who talk in absolutes  even occasionally or saying things like that simply are not sure what they want or just using you as a fallback or something to keep hanging on until they find something else.

It is OK to move on even if you have feelings because you deserve someone who feels the same about you... One sided love and hoping or waiting for them to fall in love or back into love is only punishing the person waiting.   Maybe speak up next time she says something like that. Make it clear you want/ need more and will not wait for a maybe. 

1 reply
User Profile: LTBama
LTBama OP July 3rd, 2025

Did you miss the part where I said I was looking for optimism?? I wanted to hear from people that have healed from that. That’s all. You only know half the story. It’s not one sided love. She loves me. She says it and shows it. It’s the falling in love with me again that scares her because of past trauma. Maybe read closer before replying next time. Geez

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