Do I tell my partner

@JaraGara

The decision is up to you, but I would consider how you would feel if your partner did the same thing and kept that from you. It's a tricky situation and hope you're able to navigate a way through it.

@JaraGara

It is a hard decision to make. In my opinion you should tell your partner. From there you two could work something out together. It is better than letting your partner find out one day. Also, your guilt would slowly eat you from the inside and your partner would know something is wrong. I hope everything would work out in the end no matter which decision you make.

@JaraGara Well what are you and your partners intentions with eachother? Marriage? Family? Lifelong roommates? Have you discussed your futures? If you're not sure you can keep yourself from hooking up with coworkers what makes you think your partner is right for you/you are right for your partner? If your partner is wanting more than you're able to give them it's probably best to stop stringing them along/wasting both of your times. I don't have alot to go on but sounds like your partner is being used as a contingency plan.

@JaraGara If you had any moral fiber, you wouldn't have posted this question (then again, you wouldn't have cheated either).

@JaraGara Do you know why you hooked up with your colleague? Have you done anything like this before? Are there underlying problems in your current relationship with your partner? You might need to seriously reflect on your current relationship and how you see it progressing. Honesty is important but be prepared that your partner is entirely within their right to leave as well. Do you see yourself pursuing a relationship with your colleague?

regardless of what others say i hear you ....... if i made a huge mistake that is not going to repeat itself should i tell? ..... if guilt is strong you most likely will tell ........

Well if everything was like a rom -com then you tell and talk and everything works out great ........but life is not like that ............be prepared for this to be thrown in your face or held over you during every fight or disagreement from now on .......

Sometimes when told the truth ............it KILLS all possibilities of relationship....... anger / hurt / pride even can destroy without the civil conversation and reconciliation .........

sometimes i feel people should let things go.

Don't tell your partner. If you think you'll do it again, just find another reason to break up.

No need to be hurting people who are not at fault.

Not everything needs to be explained and revealed.

I would say that it doesn't really matter what I think, since there are way too many nuances and details we don't have.

That said, I say it does matter to decide whether telling your partner or not is consistent with your deeper values. Think about who you are and what matters most to you.

Making a decision consistent with who you want to be might help you find an answer that you can live with no matter what happens next.

Hoping for the best for you.