Ego Love vs Authentic Love
I find myself highly conflicted on these two concepts and would like to inquire here about some thoughts regarding them. I understand that Ego love is based on the fulfillment of selfish desires while Authentic Love is based on selflessly striving the happiness of someone else. Still, the idea of selfless love seems to be a paradox of sorts in the context of a committed romantic relationship.
The line for me is blurry. On one hand, I have my own set of wants and needs in a relationship, but on the other hand, I also want what's best for my partner (even if that means not being with me). It would seem then that a romantic relationship is a recipe for the inevitable clashing of egos between two people who are trying to get their personal needs met. After all, Ego is fundamental to life in general. To a great extent, the Ego is necessary for our individual survival. Ego protects us from harmful and abusive relationships and to have no Ego at all would be akin to dying.
There is also the issue of attachment. Authentic Love can be defined as loving without attachment, but we can also reasonably assume that romance requires at least some attachment in order to maintain connection between partners. After all, what is the point of isolating any single commitment if we extend this same devotion to everyone else in our lives? What would distinguish a stranger from a partner?
I find myself oscillating between these two "types of love" (assuming that the only true definition of love is Authentic Love) constantly. Of course I want my partner to be happy and successful no matter what, but I also have to make sure that my own personal needs in the relationship are being fulfilled. Is this what defines a committed relationship? The constant dance of ego flare-ups and subsequent ego dissolutions between willing participants? One could argue that I could get my physical and emotional needs consistently met by a culmination of several other parties instead of relying on one person to do such heavy lifting. What is the point of committing to a single individual then? Can anyone shed some light on this? I'm starting to lose faith in the overall concept of romance.
@UNDRGRND1,
interesting view.
One does not exclude the other. They should go hand in hand, walk together, there should be no distinction.
Another concept is what's called unconditional love. Having no needs and expectations, as in, not looking for someone else to fill in your needs and your expectations. Like, not looking for love, loving yourself and thus you might meet someone who deeply resonates with your self, your inner heart energy you vibrate.
