Feeling very lost and uncertain

Hi, I'm a 32 year old female.

I have spent nearly 14 years in a relationship with someone who I have come to realise doesn't love me at all.

We have children together and get on in general but that's it.

I honestly believe he is only here because with me life is easy I work hard on repairing and forgiveness ect. So it is a easy life I suppose.

I expressed how I felt and his answer was silence and quickly moved on as if nothing was said. Again a week later explained how I felt and his previous reaction made me feel co fident he was not interested anymore. He said if he didn't want to be here he wouldn't...

I'm all for working on things.. But I feel utterly heart broken , I feel angry and unloved we don't have sex often and I feel like a friend not a other half ect.

I put my feelings aside for years because I love him with everything I have. I have been faithful and supported him and put up with so much heartache too because i couldn't ever see myself without him even when i could feel my mental health dipping because of it. And yes maybe that actually makes me weak or stupid i get that but in my world i love him and just enated happiness. But I just can't do this anymore. I feel like my life right now is no life at all. I'm a shell of who I once was. I couldn't even tell you the last time I went out with a friend because I just have 100% put everything into thsi relationship.

I wish it was different but no matter what way I try and have this conversation his answer is the same and no difference in the relationship after. I just realise now hiw much of a fool and idiot I must look to him. Because I feel it.

I miss feeling loved and fancied and appreciated. I miss connection and touch I just think I'm better off alone alone and out of relationships because I have been everything I should be and I'm still not good enough for him.

I want out and scared of parenting alone moving ect. I know it has to be done though. Just wish I hadn't been a door mat all these years because right now I'm feeling really vulnerable, low and felt like I've lost years of my life.