Gaslight

@anayiii

I'm sorry to hear you are going through this.

Stand strong.

Know your own mind.

Stand up for yourself.

Make it clear it is not acceptable.

Be prepared to walk away if the relationship is not bringing love, respect and happiness to your life.

You deserve better, don't forget that ever! 🥰💜

@anayiii

The constant reframing of your reality, being told you’re “playing the victim,” and feeling “crazy” are emotional manipulation tactics that can undermine your sense of truth, identity, and worth.

Gaslighting thrives on confusion. You may begin to second-guess your memories, actions, and feelings. Research urges the importance of affirming your emotional experiences as valid, even when your partner denies or minimizes them. Keeping a journal of what happened, what was said, and how it made you feel helps you build a clear timeline of events outside your partner’s distortion.

According to relationship studies, arguing with someone who is gaslighting you is often fruitless, because their goal isn’t truth as much as it’s control over the narrative. Instead of debating reality, you can say:

“I see it differently,” or “I know how I felt, even if you don’t agree.”

This approach protects your reality without inviting more emotional manipulation.

In short, always remember that gaslighting is manipulation.

One major hallmark of gaslighting is isolation. Your comment that “no one knows the truth” and “no one is there to tell my partner they’re wrong” suggests that you're feeling alone. Research suggests reconnecting with trusted friends, family, or a therapist who affirms your perception is important to breaking the gaslighter’s influence.

Studies show that people with higher emotional intelligence (EQ) and secure attachment styles are less likely to internalize gaslighting. This doesn’t mean it's your fault, but it shows that tools like boundary-setting, assertiveness, and understanding emotional manipulation can offer protection.

A good boundary might sound like:

“I’m not going to discuss this if I keep being told I’m making things up.”

If you are unaware of "attachment styles", there are several books on the topic. I liked "Attached" by Amir Levine, but you can find your own.

The phrase “I feel crazy” is tragically common in gaslighting survivors. Therapy, especially trauma-informed or abuse-informed, helps you rebuild trust in your own perceptions. In one study, many individuals achieved posttraumatic growth after recognizing gaslighting and leaving those environments 

You are not crazy. You are in a situation where your sense of truth is being deliberately eroded, and recognizing that is already the first step toward reclaiming your power.

If you’re ever in danger or feel emotionally trapped, consider talking to a therapist or a domestic violence resource. You're not alone, and your experience matters.