How to provide.....for your mom.
Hey there not sure if this is at the right department
I need to help and i need to vent, and i need to get away far away.....
My issue has been coming on for a year and abit now. I am 30 years of age and my work isnt soooo awsome financially, i lived on my own, but my mother's husband became abusive towards her so i went to fetch her in another town, problem is this was beginning of 2023, and since then she hasnt lifted a finger to look for work and she is looking towards me for financial support... I cant keep up with my bills, and evrytime i mention she needs to get work, sge puts me on a heavy guilt trip, and shouts at me and belittles me.
I am a soft hearted person wich tends to stress up very very quickly, so obviously her behaviour is breaking me to the ground. Please advise?
@QueBone,
move out and find your own place. It's great you're trying to be there for her but you're not responsible for her.
@QueBone
It is hard and she may throw a fit but she knew your job was not going to be able to pay all and yes one more person makes a difference... while we can feel bad for what she has been through .... if she wants a life she has to go out and work for it
@QueBone
I am also a very soft hearted person but you have to put yourself first. You've done more than enough for your mom but it seems that you are becoming stressed. Don't let her make you think that you've not done enough respectfully.
@communicativeCar962
You've already saved your mom from the dangerous situation that she was in
Hi @QueBone,
I am too a soft hearted person and I know how it feels to be guilt tripped by parents/ in laws, it takes a heavy metal toll on us and can impact our mental and emotional health to the core…
In my view, parents are supposed to be selfless and give out of love not out of the expectation for a “return of the favour”... that’s just my personal experience.
I think you’re mum is being quite selfish especially if you have been clear to her about how you’re struggling financially…
I think my advice would be you just have to stand up for yourself and tell her firmly and clearly that you are struggling to pay for the bills and that she will have to find a job otherwise she will have ti move out. Respect comes both ways. Even for parents. I know that’s easier said than done, but I just think your mum is being a bit selfish.