Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

How to win her over

User Profile: goldenStrings6189
goldenStrings6189 August 9th, 2025

My girlfriend and I got in a huge fight over my liking other girls bikini pictures. In full honesty, I had no idea I was doing it. I just doom scroll and like and didn’t notice. However, I have always known that this isn’t okay and should have paid more attention. She’s really hurt, which is fair, but hasn’t talked to me in almost two weeks (we’re medium distance and she wants to talk in out in person). When we have briefly talked, it’s just been fighting and she’s been pretty vulgar when expressing her anger and pain. How do I win her over when we talk in person? It was an honest mistake and I don’t want our relationship to be over because of it.

5
User Profile: YourCaringConfidant
YourCaringConfidant August 9th, 2025

@goldenStrings6189 I understand that you and her both feel that you are in the wrong for liking images of other females in bikinis. Being she's a woman, it's disrespectful to the relationship.... yes... but... what she is doing and how she is behaving is wrong too! In my opinion, that's abusive because of the intention behind of. This is not healthy for the relationship. How can a relationship work with no real communication? For the sake of the relationship, please don't allow this to continue. You may have did somethinc you regret, but this is not warranting weeks of no talking. It just doesn't add up. What is she hoping this will solve? I'm sorry you're at the point of uncertainty between the both you. Thus is where she is the best person to talk to to find out what's going on. I hope you both can work this out and forgive. Please be kind to yourself in the meantime. Take care. ♡

User Profile: intellectualVase2518
intellectualVase2518 August 9th, 2025

@goldenStrings6189 I understand how your girlfriend feels. After interpreting your action as a threat to exclusivity—or to just liking her—those feelings of insecurity and fear of abandonment can end up being expressed as anger.


However, the way she is expressing her anger and hurt concerns me, specifically the fact that when you two try to communicate, she ends up being vulgar. This indicates to me that she is unable to process and regulate her emotions in a healthy way. Such a pattern can easily turn the relationship into an unhealthy one.

So, I just hope that when you meet again in person, you both end up apologizing to each other—you for not realizing the subconscious nature of your behavior, and she for not being able to maintain a respectful conversation with you, not just you apologizing to her.
2 replies
User Profile: YourCaringConfidant
YourCaringConfidant August 9th, 2025

@intellectualVase2518 This! 💯 💯 Wonderfully expressed! 

1 reply
User Profile: intellectualVase2518
intellectualVase2518 August 9th, 2025

@YourCaringConfidant I appreciate your kind words. You also raise a great point about how it’s hard to make a relationship work when there isn’t real communication. After reading that almost two weeks had passed without them talking to each other, I couldn’t help but think that this couldn’t be healthy. However, I prefer to give her the benefit of the doubt, because taking space for herself might be her way of coping with feelings of hurt. So, I just hope she at least communicated with him and told him that she needed time alone to think and deal with her emotions, instead of just straight up ignoring him by avoiding any conversation.

load more
load more
User Profile: eloise1071
eloise1071 August 9th, 2025

@goldenStrings6189 give her time to heal ,iit must ve broken her heart still u need to let her know that u do understand her pain and that u didnt do it on pupose and that u re willing to change , the way u explained it to us in this post ,the best way to do that is to gop to meet her in person ,try not to mention the vulger speaking part now ,but if it bothers u talk to her about it when u start talking again .