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I am struggling to trust my partner

User Profile: considerateSkies6730
considerateSkies6730 September 14th, 2023

A few weeks ago me and my partner had a break for a week, I had a bad feeling when he came back and checked his phone. He had been looking up escorts. I confronted him the next day and he says his head was all over the place and didn't actually go to one, I just can't stop thinking about it we have a 6 year old child. What shall I do


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User Profile: toughTiger6481
toughTiger6481 September 14th, 2023

@considerateSkies6730

What you do is get to the bottom of your relationship ..... it is not all one person never is the problems lie in the middle you are not communicating clearly or honestly and if he was careless enough to show escort searches perhaps he wanted you to feel like it could happen to spur you to want to fix your relationship asap.

real people who want to do something OFTEN are not careless enough to leave a trace.


User Profile: fernforest
fernforest September 15th, 2023

@considerateSkies6730 if you had a break from your relationship, I'm not surprised. That indicates some issues in the relationship. I don't know if it's possible to save the relationship or not. Steve Harvey said about a cheating man (I assume he MAY HAVE cheated): If he crawls back to you begging for another chance, give him ONE chance. Then make him pay, make it up to you. Take you on nice dates, buy you something. And then forgive him. It can go one of two ways. He might end up a changed man, a better man. Or, he doesn't change, and then you have to move on. Jordan Peterson said about cheating: in order to get past cheating, you need to deeply discuss all the motivations for why it happened and exactly what it entailed. And then you need to grow past it together. But, it's a tough path. (Maybe that's where marriage counseling can help).

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September 15th, 2023

Then your partner isn't worthy of your trust.........simply put it

User Profile: FeureVox
FeureVox September 15th, 2023

@considerateSkies6730 I am sorry to read what you are challenged with in life. I would only share my unbiased thoughts being a male:


1. You must have an honest and calm conversation with your partner about your concerns and feelings regarding his actions.

2. But please allow your partner to explain his perspective without interruption.

3. If you think the above doesn't work and you can afford it, consider couples therapy to work through trust issues with the help of a professional.

4. I suggest establishing clear boundaries in your relationship to create a sense of security.

5. Most importantly, prioritize self-care to manage your well-being during this challenging time.

6. Remember that rebuilding trust takes time and consistent effort from both partners.

7. I'm sure you're a caring and loving mother, so please ensure your child would NEVER have to see you two in such contradictory conditions. Also, your child's emotional needs are met as you work through these issues.

8. Keep evaluating your relationship every night before you sleep to reflect on whether the relationship is healthy and fulfilling for both of you.

Lastly, remind yourself, whenever you think negatively about your relationship, "Trust can be rebuilt with commitment, but prioritize your emotional well-being throughout the process."

Feel free to contact me if you ever feel like talking about anything.
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