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I don't know what to do

User Profile: RedCherry2000
RedCherry2000 November 29th, 2023

I am currently in a relationship with a man, who I genuinely care for, but I don't see a future with him. I know I should break up with him but I don't know why it feels so difficult to do. I don't want to lose him as a friend but of I left him, that would happen. I don't even have any friends in this town so I'd be even more lonely. I guess the question is, how can I cope with the loneliness of having no one to lean on? 

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User Profile: blindGrace277
blindGrace277 November 30th, 2023

@RedCherry2000 Hello RedCherry2000,


It sounds like you're facing a difficult situation, and it's completely understandable that you're feeling torn. Deciding to end a relationship is never easy, especially when you care for the person but don't see a future together.

Firstly, it's important to recognize that your feelings are valid, and it's okay to prioritize your own well-being and happiness. It's not uncommon for the fear of loneliness to make a decision like this even more challenging.

Coping with loneliness after a breakup can be tough, but there are steps you can take to navigate this period:

1. **Build a Support System:**
   Look for opportunities to connect with others, whether it's through existing friendships, joining clubs or activities, or even online communities. Having a support system can make a significant difference.

2. **Self-Reflection:**
   Take this time to reflect on your own needs, desires, and goals. Use the opportunity to rediscover yourself and what brings you joy and fulfillment.

3. **Professional Support:**
   If you find the emotional challenges too overwhelming, consider seeking the help of a therapist or counselor. They can provide guidance and support as you navigate through this transition.

4. **Hobbies and Interests:**
   Engage in activities you enjoy or explore new hobbies. This can be a great way to meet like-minded individuals and create a sense of purpose outside of a relationship.

5. **Take Small Steps:**
   Break down the process into manageable steps. It might be difficult initially, but taking small, intentional steps towards building a new social network can gradually ease the loneliness.

6. **Give Yourself Time:**
   Healing takes time, and it's okay to feel a range of emotions. Be patient with yourself as you go through the process of adapting to a new chapter in your life.

Remember, you deserve to be in a relationship that aligns with your vision for the future and brings you fulfillment. It's a tough decision, but prioritizing your own well-being is an important step towards personal growth.

If you have more specific concerns or questions, feel free to share. I'm here to listen and support you.
User Profile: toughTiger6481
toughTiger6481 November 30th, 2023

@RedCherry2000

i like to imagine in reverse.... how would you feel if the person in a relationship with you sees no future?

How does he feel? do you know? 

it is hard when in a new place/ city etc  and many tend to hold on to any friend or person they do know. Often the friendship or relationship may not be on the basis of things beyond comfortable and here....

There are even marriages like this people let a relationship go on and on out of convenience. convince themselves and one day realize they are / were never happy .... make friend find other support and if this has no future let him go for both of you

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User Profile: KatePersephone
KatePersephone December 1st, 2023

@RedCherry2000 thank you for sharing this with the community <3 i unfortunately do not have any suggestions to provide, but i really understand how difficult it must be for you to break up with them considering not only you'd lose them as a friend, which you do not want, but that you also do not have someone else to be there for you from your town. i really hope you manage to find a way out of this!

User Profile: unassumingPear147
unassumingPear147 December 1st, 2023

You should get your self detach as Soon As posible . I dont know how you should do this. But you should do it As soon as Possible beacuse the much time your are spending in this is that much trouble and toxity you are creeating for your self.

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