Initiation issues
I don’t know how to come on to my partner. When we’re in the moment, or I’m in the mood, I almost feel like I revert to a younger version of myself & I get extremely shy and reserved. It makes me seem very awkward & my SO has told me he feels like I’m not attracted to him, or that I just don’t want him because I’m never the one to initiate.
I know a lot of it is a huge fear of rejection stemming from past experiences. But how do I move past that?
we’ve been together 8 years & it is something I don’t want to struggle with anymore. I want to be able to just say what I want or at least make it clear with body cues or something..
any tips?
@SimplyMeCreative
I saw a ted talk on a discussion on this type of thing. Of course a partner wants to feel desired and wanted and if they always initiate they may not feel that they are attractive to us.
Telling them in suggestive texts you can send with out feeling embarrassed or uncomfortable. i usually give a back rub .... or hugs at anytime for example while he make lunch for work i will rub his back and he turns and i give him a big hug.... this just is small flirty things that are very easy to do... working up to whatever works for you as a couple .
if he wants something more direct then try walking into shower while he is in there or cuddling at night .... it will come to you and his suggesting you make this effort should assure you of small or no chance of rejection....
Thanks for responding! You definitely make some solid points and thanks for the suggestions!
He does say that I don’t flirt with him enough, I just don’t think about it..but I do want to. I will just have to work on it
@SimplyMeCreative
You are not alone we forget to ... we think they know how we feel or see them it is just so easy to tell them ... in small ways.
