I think I may be mentally unwell
For a long time I've been in a cycle of broken relationships, constantly being told I am too negative, that I make people uncomfortable, that people don't wanna be around me. No matter how much I try and work on myself this doesn't seem to ever change. I think something might be wrong with me. I can't afford to seek a diagnosis so its causing me a lot of distress.
@marineSoul8922
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Im sorry that you feel this way and are struggling.
Remember, there are always two sides in a relationship and people make excuses to leave, take most things they say with a grain of salt.
Its not always reflective of you but them.
It's always good to work on ourselves, but for you, because you deserve to be happy and uplifted, not brought down 💜💕
@marineSoul8922
Do you have a negative vibe? Did they give you examples of items or ever try to help you like showing you a different perspective? Change requires you believing it is a problem not just what someone has said to you.
I use to hang around a person who was IMO too optimistic about things and not very realistic... they said i brought them down because i was more reality focused.
@toughTiger6481 I'm just not sure, a lot of people who are unrelated to each other say it to me all the time so there's gotta be something to it. I am pretty depressed lately a lot, and can be a little gloomy in general I guess. I get into text fights a lot, even though they don't feel like fights in the moment. It feels like if I know someone long enough they'll find a reason to disrespect or hate me or acuse me of being a bad faith actor. Idk. It's confusing and it's why I worry something is wrong with me.
@marineSoul8922
Is there anyone you trust to ask for true insight? I have a person i run things by they may say things like yes a person was wrong but in the big picture is that worth your time? helps me not stay angry.
When frustrated we all can respond in a negative way. When we already feel frustrated or targeted ...we read more into texts or gestures and can respond in angry ways. It is IMO normal reaction. We just need to root out the cause of frustration.... being disrespected is an issue for me and when that happens i get to a point of being maybe too quick to respond ...
I take a step back and review the situation. Is it worth my time to respond to negativity or with negativity... Letting go is not as easy as it sounds... you have built up frustrations... like when you tell/ write about her disrespect i bet many ... one time she did this or that enter your head maybe you even feel physically ... my blood pressure goes up when angry with spouse for example
Therapy frankly is often more just asking the similar questions about how you feel and if you can try to see from another point of view.
@toughTiger6481 I don't really have someone I trust that much to share that with no. Usually around most people I am quite selective about mentioning that sort of thing. In the past people have labeled it as venting and it makes them uncomfortable so I'd rather not. And I worry if I say something too scary they'll call the police on me.
Hey marineSoul,
First of all, I’m really sorry you're feeling this way. It takes courage to put that out there, especially when you’re already carrying so much self-doubt and pain.
What you’re describing doesn’t make you broken. It makes you human. We all have patterns we struggle with, especially in relationships, and when people repeatedly tell us we’re "too much" or "not enough," it starts to sink into our sense of identity. That doesn't mean they're right. It means you've likely been misunderstood or unsupported in ways that left marks.
You said you’re trying to work on yourself, and honestly, that already says a lot. The fact that you’re reflecting, questioning, even reaching out now that’s not weakness. That’s self-awareness. That’s effort. That’s strength, even if it doesn’t feel like it right now.
You’re not alone. A lot of people feel like something might be wrong with them simply because they’ve never had safe, accepting spaces to just be as they are. It’s frustrating when money stands in the way of accessing help, but talking here can still be a form of healing. You're allowed to exist as you are, even in the mess, even in the unknown.
If you're open to it, keep speaking. Keep showing up. You’re not invisible here.
Sending warmth your way.
