Lost everyone, Choice or a Curse

@AReineRose I am sorry that your friend has been through a lot. Tell her she has always been strong enough to face the problems so will get through it hero 🥺. We are all here for her. Tell her she is never alone ❤️

@AReineRose I faced problems like her before but Thanks to God I could survive 🙏

@AReineRose bless her 💖 life isn't fair or easy and it can damage our mental health in all kind of ways🙁 your friend has clearly withdrawn from her once social life, but that's ok because that's how she is protecting herself and mind💖 but going forward maybe a fresh start is needed with a whole  set of new people and those one of two that means the world to her 💖 but in her own time when she's ready there's no point in pushing these things. Give her a hug from me and tell her she isn't alone. I hope one-day she will be able to join us here at cups💖💖

@AReineRose

Its important she navigates and processes things at her own pace. Sometimes what works for us might not be what works for others and that's ok. Its important I feel not to completely withdraw or cut herself off because the longer it goes on, it can be hard to shift from this way of being and we all need connection, sending her my best wishes 💜🥰

It is such a nice feeling when you are part of someone's change and improvement 💚💖

For most part I really never had anyone. I had 1 classmate in 4th grade but we werent really close but there was something About her that for 30 years I have wondered and worried About. My daughter suggested I search for her on social meadia. There were so many similar names as her that after 2 tries with 2 different I had lost hope and decided not to pursue it any further. However 2 weeks later I turn on and my husband got nervous. I had screamed as loud as I could. I had found her. However I was very afraid to call her because I had always vied her as being better than me-she was rich I wasnt. Til one day in my day treatment program my group member turned to me and said how do you know she may be worse off than you. At that point I decided to call. Funny thing the group member was right. She had gotten into things I never have. In time after sharing with her the tools I had learned in my program she stopped drinking as well as stopped having suidal thoughts of self harm.She had one relapse but has been sober free now for years despite dealing with her family who participated in both drugs and alcohol which her dad a famous artist had supplied the funds for the substances. Of cause. My mom although she was present and did the every day responsibities of caring for me wasn’t supportive of me from 9 years old up to when I was 34 except one time in my 20’s when she left to the next demension. However she gave her all in supporting my children just not with me. Others had physically and mentally abused me plus having epilepsy and later on from 9 on I became excessively shy which til this day at 65 I still suffer greatly from shyness yet am somewhat better than I once was. Staff in my program and About 4 others who live far away which 1 includes my husband who between him and my mom both now have gone to the next demension of life. Him passing 5 years ago its like just minutes ago since he left. Although I did better in regards of not going through a major depresson as I did with my mom. It seems I can’t get over the loss. I try imagining him stil with me and although it helps a bit it still isnt enough. The more he comes up in my memories so does my mom along with God. When I think of them I become saddend theyre no longer with me physical and yet I gues one could say I imagine them being together despite knowing deep down they are not. There isnt a day that goes by that I dont mention his name. I think people are getting tired of my saying his name every day which can be as often as 1-5 times a day and my mom maybe every 2-3 days I talk on her. Whats odd when she first passed I didnt mourn her or nothing despite being severely depresses and non functional. Maybe that was a state of mourning I dont really know but it wasnt til Ilost my husband that I really started thinking of her. I feel bad. Though I have my children my son has been estranged from his sister and me tthat it almost feels like a death despite fact we will text each other occasionally but he will never call and he will never answer his phone if I should call. Mt daughter seems somewhat angry with both her brother and I and despite us once being extremerly close she will condemn and critize me talking to me as if I was nothing she has her good side but most times when I am visting her and my granddaughter she will leave the house with no thought About me leaving me here alone close to 4- 16 hours a day. Its lonely I feel as if I have no one who really cares. Those that did care even it was very little such as my mom are gone. If I hadnt been in program as long as I was  wouldnt have nothing to hang on to because staff and clients were the only ones who were there for me and supported me. I normally wont go out much because where I do live I can be active but since losing my husband and not being able to afford to keep up with the cost of rent I commute back n forth to his family and my daughter where transportation is close to nothing. I cant deive due to having epilepsy and many in my daughters area either dring drug or what have you which I have never and thankfully never got into not even as much as smoking. Though my husband and mom are gone occasionally I will talk to them and pray they are watching over me and protecting me just as I know God is which I know God moe so is watching over me with my husband trying to do just as he did when he was here physically. Its just so hard going day to day but for them as well as for my children, granddaughters and myself I do everything I possibly can to take care of myself and my medical needs although occasionally I may fall a bit. Its hard for sure but one thing that wasnt true About me n the past is that now I am determined to keep up with the process of healing and staying in this life for as long as God allows.

@AReineRose

The best thing that she can do? Choose better friends. Who you place around you, in your life, matters.

They may have betrayed her, but to what degree? Were there minor infractions or major issues? "Betrayals" is vague.

It's ok to have standards, when it comes to friend choices. Have zero tolerance policy for serious infractions, however be compassionate for people who make genuine mistakes because nobody is going to be perfect. I met someone who got rid of people in their life for even the most minor of things and they cycled through people, never finding any sense of happiness and ending up depressed and lonely.

Our lives are more enriched and more fulfilled with people in our life, however - WE get to choose who we associate with, and what impact that has on our lives is depending on the quality of those individuals.

At some point, your "friend" has to take a sense of responsibility for who he or she allowed into their life, what boundaries were broken, and how trust was provided - especially if it wasn't earned over a long period of time.

There are lots of people out there, and not all of them are bad or would betray someone.

@AReineRose

Friends have such a huge impact in our lives either good or bad