Mixed feelings
Hi, I want help with something. I have met Two guys in my life. The first one I loved so much that I thought I would never love anybody again. It took me four years to forget him, and when I tried to love someone else, I couldn't, but the problem is that I have become attracted to many guys, but when they become mine, I feel that I don't want to continue this relationship, and when I end it, I feel alone again and want someone to hold me, love me and I love him...I wasn't like this before I knew him.I no longer trust my feelings. I thought I loved someone and then discovered that I didn't love him. I began to miss something that I had never missed before. I began to feel like I was just looking for someone to fill the void inside me. I don't know what to do. I want your help.
@azureSky3305
First loves are hard to get over.
Hard to forget.
It can be hard to trust again.
When we are lonely, it can be easy to mistake lust for love, we just want to be held and someone to share our time with, but there's the danger we just settle.
Don't compare everyone to your first love.
But don't rush into things.
Wait until they feel right.
Trust your instincts.
You deserve love again 💕💜
You are right, thanks for your advice ❤
@azureSky3305It sounds like you’ve been through a lot emotionally, and it’s really confusing for you right now. You loved someone very deeply before, and that love changed the way you experience relationships now. It makes sense that after being hurt once, it’s hard to tell what your heart truly feels.
It must be painful to want love and closeness but to also feel unsure or disconnected once you have it. You’re noticing this cycle of wanting connection and then feeling empty or distant, and that shows how self-aware you are. It’s understandable that you’d start to question your feelings, it’s hard when you don’t know what’s real or what’s just trying to fill a void.
You’re not alone in feeling this way. Many people struggle after a deep heartbreak, trying to find that same kind of connection again but feeling afraid or unsure. It’s okay to take your time to understand what love means for you now. Be patient with yourself , you’re healing, even if it doesn’t feel like it yet.
@azureSky3305
You say it took you four years to get over him, but you sound like you are still holding that experience as the thing you want.
IMO love with someone else is NOT going to feel the same..... it can feel better or like you describe not meet your expectations.
New Love takes time, and you may be fighting it because if you find someone new that really works etc. your past BF or old love fades away, and you may not want that you have spent a long time holding up the memory as a shield to keep others from living up to your expectations.
Now my heart has become closed. I didn't feel that I loved anyone else and I think that I will never feel the feelings that I had when I was with him again.
@azureSky3305
That is OK. love does feel different that does not make it wrong.
I know of others as well as myself that when we met and fell in love with someone else even after a long-term relationship ended. It felt different but in many cases much better than our first love type of feelings. The other person in a relationship brings things into it the last person did not or could not bring into the relationship. we grow and change as people and when we hold onto a specific feeling or time, we stunt that growth.
You are right, thank you very much for your words
