My mom won't accept my relationship with this guy online
Hi, so I've been talking to this guy for a bit over a year now at this point. We've become pretty close & all that kinda of stuff etc. So today I told my mom and she wasn't happy about it at all. We wanna meet up irl & he'd said he would even fly me out there to meet him irl. My aunt Née Née said to my mom that this guy is an abuser and a user which I don't believe at all bc he's such a great person towards me etc... I'm 19 and he's 23 turning 24 in February. What do I do to make my mom accept this relationship and understand that he's a good person??? I've been in tears all afternoon to be honest bc I really like this guy & he likes me too!!! Any advice is greatly appreciated :)
Thank you for reading this!
@wileyt100
The reality is your family is worried as ONLINE a person can be whatever they want to ... Have you ever seen the show "catfish" .............. They can be charming and sweet and IRL could be different.... While i am NOT saying every situation is .......but some are and your family may worry about that. If you want to meet irl if would be better if he is on your turf.
It is hard to be rational about things when you have spoke to them and feel you truly know them.
It is unfortunate that anyone in online thing often faces this with family and friends. If you are confident make plans that soothe their fears . Meet on your terms with family there if your friend is not willing that may be a red flag. Once met in person your family may see that NOT every online thing is a bad thing.
@toughTiger6481
Well I'm planning to go meet him irl in July for my birthday!!! And I'll be going alone by myself probably but I can handle it I think!!! My mom won't allow him to come here to meet irl so I have to do it this way or won't ever meet him irl.
@wileyt100
I hope you think through the whole plan of a meet IRL. Something you might consider is talking with your mom about the whole thing ... I know you might say you tried etc.
Keep trying......... if you think it is serious because IF the relationship progresses this does not just go away. The friction of how this went down can pop up when ever you have an issue. My mom was not a big fan of my now spouse and would say awful things if i ever had a fight in my relationship it sucked knowing she was actually trying the " i told you so " move ....
What is her hesitation the safety aspect? The age difference? or something else? .... knowing her issue not guessing what it is makes it easier to work things out.
Yes the safety aspect is one of her main concerns along with me traveling by my self to meet up irl w/him. But it's my life and I'm an adult SO I will be making my own decisions for me myself and I!!!
@wileyt100。
@wileyt100 maybe your mother is experienced and find some detail cause her became a skepticism toward your friend. thinking deeper and recalling the day life when you stay with your friend. then, maybe have a conversation with your mother again? just try to ask your mother why she think your friend is a abuser and use the details and eg to prove that he is really a good person in everyday life.
