No contact
Me and my bf fight so he asked me to never text him and he's giving me silent treatment we haven't talk for 10 days he doesn't come and make any effort why is this he's always like this whenever there'd conflicts between us and I am the one who make an effort to solve it but now I stop sending him messages because he's like this for 1 year and I really need him to stop treating me with silent but I am worried will he ever come back or
@fairmindedCar8772
Hey, thank you for sharing this. Ten days without talking is a long time, especially when you're left wondering whether he'll reach out, what he's thinking, or whether you should message him again. Sitting with that uncertainty can be exhausting.
What stood out to me is that this isn't the first time it has happened. You say that for the past year, whenever you have a conflict, you're usually the one who tries to fix things. That is a lot to carry, and I can understand why you've reached a point where you don't want to keep being the only one making an effort.
When someone stops communicating after an argument, you're left with no real way to understand where things stand. And when you're normally the person who reaches out first, it can feel as though fixing everything has been left to you again.
I can't know whether he will come back, and I understand why you're worried about that. But I also wonder: if he contacted you tomorrow, what would you need from him for things to feel different this time?
You don't have to sit with all of this alone. You're welcome to keep sharing here. 💛
I always forget whenever conflict happens after that I try to communicate and solve the issue but he isn't making any effort to communicate if he text me tomorrow I will be happy and reply back
@fairmindedCar8772
That makes sense. I don't think there's anything wrong with feeling happy if he reaches out.
I hope that, if you two talk again, it isn't only about getting past this argument. It sounds like what's really hurting you is feeling alone whenever there's conflict
@fairmindedCar8772
the cycle will continue as long as you let it... he Knows the silent treatment works he probably smiles at any text or you trying to "fix" it. Which means most likely is let him have his way.
Is that what you want from now on? if not do not text and act as if you have other plans he will need to decide to participate in this relationship and not expect you to do all the compromise.
Yes for almost more than a year I am in this loop I need to end this loop and want him to make an effort to solve the conflict and communicate but he's not doing any of that I want to communicate and solve the issue I don't like silent treatment it's hurting me like he'll .he's not reaching out to me made me realize that all these years I was just forcing him to talk I feel like that if he really cares can't he come by thus time no matter whomever issue
@fairmindedCar8772
Yes, you are correct. The reality is for people who play this silent treatment cycle as long as it works for them, they will not change. even if it hurts and you hate the silent treatment make it look like it has zero effect and he will have to re-evaluate his go yo move of silent treatment.
@fairmindedCar8772
Yes, you are correct. The reality is for people who play this silent treatment cycle as long as it works for them, they will not change. Even though you hate the silent treatment make it look like it has zero effect and he will have to re-evaluate his go To move of silent treatment.
@fairmindedCar8772
Yes, you are correct. The reality is for people who play this silent treatment cycle as long as it works for them, they will not change. Even though you hate the silent treatment make it look like it has zero effect and he will have to re-evaluate his go To move of silent treatment.
