Relationship advice
I have been in a relationship with a man for a year and a half but it’s been ups and downs. He has cheated twice with texting girls or asking for *** how to I stop myself from over thinking and waiting to go through his phone. I wanna be able to trust him with everything but he cheated because he always thought I was *** or angry. After we talked about everything things got better but how do I stop my thoughts.
Please give advice
@gentleApril28 Are you sure it's your thoughts you need to control? He cheated on you multiple times and broke your trust. It's understandable if you have second thoughts and feel the need to check his phone to make sure he's not doing it again. But ask yourself this: is this a life that you are ok living with? Not being able to trust the man you're with? Letting doubt and insecurities creep in because of a broken up. The issue here is not your thoughts. The issue here is the fact trust has been broken. You do as you do though. You're the one that has to live with it. Has he done his part to work on regaining your trust? Trust is earned through actions. Has he apologized truly? Has he given you closure? He has to do his part. I applaud you for trying to rid yourself of these intrusive thoughts and for rising above to not be the type who creeps through a phone, but that's not healthy to do. I really hope that he's doing what he needs to do as a man for the sake of the relationship and keeping someone like you. I do wish you all the best with everything! Please take care of yourself.
@gentleApril28 @gentleApril28 I also want to mention that because he betrayed you by cheating, you have every right to have these thoughts. There is nothing wrong with them.
I am so sorry that this is so hard for you.
Take some time to understand how you feel about the situation. Maybe chat to a listener or a therapist, or a friend that you trust. Also... what advice might you give a friend in the same situation?
Take care, do something kind for yourself.
I would love to talk about this