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Sick and tired

User Profile: Killjoywalrus
Killjoywalrus June 20th, 2023

I feel very alone. My fiancé and I have been together for almost 5 years. He is 26 I am 23. We have a 17 month old. He quit his job (which I agreed to) in February due to mental health problems. We both agreed I would only have to work up for 1 month or until his meds were in order. I worked part time to help us get by. Tried full time but my job couldn’t give me the hours. He started looking for a new job in April. Hasn’t had a job since. I got less hours and eventually quit my job. I started applying to new jobs and eventually was able to find one in a week and got hired the next day. Which makes me believe he wasn’t trying hard enough or was to picky on his choices. I am getting tired of having to rely on His parents. We are living in a house owned by his parents (who have been helping us financially as well) and we both feel awful having to depend on them. On top of that, I ask for more help with our son simply because I am exhausted in the morning from work. I do janitorial work at a medical facility from 5:30pm to whenever I finish (most often 10pm) It’s Constant physical work that is hurting my body and mostly my back. My body isn’t use to this kind of work but I have to do what i have to do to make money. He refuses to get him up in the morning because he puts him down for bed every night I work (Monday through Friday) and because he slept late. I help him through the day and our son goes to bed at 6:30 anyways so he only really watching him for 2 hours by himself. He is becoming more distant from me and is constantly on his phone even when watching our son. It almost seems as if he has lost interest or is really depressed and does not have a desire to be intimate or be fully present, to which I full understand But It’s just taking a toll on our relationship. I feel very unappreciated and guilty for putting my son in this situation. I’ve thought about leaving but I can’t. I’ve been through my parents separation, I can’t imagine putting my son through that.

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User Profile: toughTiger6481
toughTiger6481 June 25th, 2023

@Killjoywalrus

Sorry you are facing that ..... it is very frustrating when you are carrying the load and someone is watching from the sidelines and not even making much effort .

i would agree that he may not have been looking very hard as that is a long time to not find something.......maybe he is being too picky....

i believe the resentment will grow ....if you do not speak up and tell him he needs to be a partner and work too etc.