Sometimes I feel alone in my relationship.

I don't really know what this vent is supposed to be, I'm just venting and word vomiting here.

Sometimes I feel alone in my relationship. I love my boyfriend a lot and we're currently in the process of moving in together into our first apartment. At the start of our relationship he was very very loving and affectionate and attentive and sappy and it made me feel very loved. Over a year and a half later, our dynamic is a bit different. He's not sappy or romantic or affectionate the way he was and doesn't smile at me like he used to. We don't hug as much. He'll lay on me if we happen to have time together to watch something or let me lay on him. But when I try to be sappy he turns it into a joke. He tends to seem reluctant when I want to initiate a hug more times than not.

I have expressed how I feel multiple times. I've asked him to be more serious when I'm trying to be affectionate because that's me trying to connect with him. I feel like he gets it but also forgets and it just kind of falls back into the same sense of distance. I've told him that I feel distant from him a few times and he never understands why. I've told him that I need him to be more affectionate because I'm struggling and have been struggling. I can tell that he's been trying and things have gotten better but still sometimes I feel alone, or like I care more about the relationship than he does.

Sometimes I feel like I have to push for affection and sentimentalities, but I don't want it if it's forced. I want to be loved without having to ask for it. I don't know if he realizes yet that love is more than just a feeling, it's also a practice.