What she really wants
I get connected with a beautiful girl 3yrs back. We started as friends and because of her breakup and certain undesired event we get closer to each other like siblings. We use to share emotions and support each other. Later she goes in another relationship where she was with the guy for like 10 months before another breakup.
She kept her 2nd relationship hidden from me. I came to know about it after 6month of her breakup. I orher hand remain available for her, as we were long distance from beginning maybe she didn't felt the connection with me like the way I felt. Its been one and half years for her 2nd breakup. Lately we started meet and use to spend time together. We somehow getting more closer now.
Boundaries get little blurry when we drink together, if it's once or twicely happened I would have considered it as emotional glitch but everytime we drink evenif its mild she start to act like we are partners and its really hard for me to hold it, I never Cross any line without proper knowing if she really wants it so far. I do really have deep feelings for her since long but she never shown such affection during normal time, yes she care about me and does have emotionally attached with me but her night behaviour is completely opposite to be called as siblings bonds.
Even now a days she willing to spend more time with me. As I who already in love with her its really getting harder to hold now for me. And I don't want to ruin our relationship by confessing her about my feelings because she been gone through a lot in past and if she not looking me as her partner then my confession about my feelings may again give her heartbreak.
I don't know what she wants, but day by day now im also started to feel insecure as her 2nd relationship hidden story did impacted my belief in her but now I'm unable to stop to care about her, I don't care what happened in past but I do really want to know what type of relationship she wants from me now.
Sorry for my English, I'm not native English speaker
Does anyone help me
@guru1ji
tell her how you feel. so much pain and anxiety occur when we hold back. if she has feelings, you start a newer type of relationship ... if she does not like you that way and sees a future then you can start healing knowing that.
if she kept 2nd relationship secret it sounds like she wants you as a backup plan. In case she does not find who, she is looking for, she will settle for you. while you may end up with the girl it will not be mutual feelings and will eventually have issues. find someone who you are the chosen one not the back up or when she is drunk and lonely plan.
Right now I'm in that condition that even thought of getting away from her gives me anxiety. Right now she is being so close to me and asking anything that may hurt can put her back in depression. I can't hurt her. If she kept me as option when she was in relationship then am I her primary now... Now a days she finds any chance to be with me and willing to travel as well as we live in different cities. Shall I wait for her decisive action than speaking directly. Im in no hurry
I may sound obsessed with her or may be I am but its not something built in 1 day but i spent more than 3 yrs around her only
