anxious attachment help
i just began a new relationship and i've been having a hard time with my anxious attachment style. he is amazing, gives me the care i need and is everything i want in a partner. he is a bit older than me and is understandably not a texter, especially because he is in school to become a doctor. this is just one thing that makes me incredibly anxious. the other night, he went out to a bar with friends (and girls) and my anxiety was triggered so badly. i know he was not doing anything at all. i do not want to be controlling towards him but i find myself crying every day because i am so certain that he is going to pull away and break up with me. please if you have advice on coping with my attachment style send it my way.
@sarahsnapdragon
i can relate with you and your feelings are valid <3 i wwanna say that with an anxious attachment style we tend to think of all the bad that could happen to us to somehow prepare for it? it makes things only more challenging tho i get it, specially since it's new feeling more apprehensive and needing time to build trust is valid
it may be helpful to talk to him and tell him about your fears? iknow talking about how we feel makes us anxious too and its like nothing works enough but sometimes kind people understand that it's not us that needs some listening and assurance but our anxiety that needs it to calm down and rationalize our thoughts better
seeking some assurance and safety in the bond you have with him or anyone in general isn't a bad thing even if it seems difficult like you're literally desperate for it .. it's not being desperate... you are ok <3 and even if it were beinh desperate your partner's actions and words can help you feel more secure tremendously
do you like talking to someone? you can share your thoughts with people here if you like ... sometimes a lot goes in our mind and together it gets confusing and more stressful so maybe sharing can help
if your like me and find sharing difficult then maybe you can try journaling? you can make a cups forum journal also 💕