how to get over being ghosted
i have a crush on this guy. he goes to my uni and i see him around campus and at the student union (SU) i think it’s more of a limmerance and maybe even an obsession, as he didn’t really know me until last week. he has seen me around and we make eye contact quite often in the uni library. i have liked him since november but i thought he wasn’t interested. we have a mutual friend who told me he’s not looking for a relationship and isn’t interested in me. last week i found him on hinge and i liked him. to my surprise, he liked me back and we matched. we talked on sunday evening sending just a few funny/ a little flirty (?) messages, but then he hasn’t replied since. it has made me feel very down all week. i know he’s been active as i have seen him on social media. i even saw him out at the SU on wednesday. so it’s not that he’s too busy to reply. i know i shouldn’t assume but i feel like that means he’s definitely not interested and is ignoring me for the reason he simply doesn’t wish to talk to me. on top of this, i have had no matches on hinge in about a week. the whole situation is making me feel undesirable and gross. my self esteem is really low and it’s having a big impact on my mental health. i just feel not good enough for him and it’s making me feel terrible. i was wondering if anyone had any advice on what i should!! whether i should talk to him or not get closure. any advice also on how to get over him, or how to make it stop feeling so awful. thanks :)
@sopg1
I'm sorry you're going through this, sopg. I can't know for sure, but it does seem like he was just in the mood for a brief flirt and wasn't really serious. It is so very hard to feel good in a world where it's so very simple to get ghosted. Your post is well written, so I bet you're a smart person, and you likely have a pile of other awesome qualities that make you very likable. Take comfort in the fact that you are a good-hearted person. Spending your energy on a person who shows you their heart right away is the person worth that energy spent. Be patient and kind, and the right person will find you. As they say, you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince! :)
this is such a lovely message, thank you. i’m trying to work on my self confidence because i believe the root issue is how i view myself. i’m also trying to avoid seeing him so i can forget about him. your kind reply honestly made me feel a lot better so thank you so much :)
@sopg1,
this is not ghosting. He just is not interested.
yeah i think you are correct. i think i misspoke as his lack of a reply made me confused and i was holding onto hope. but i now am coming to terms with the fact that he just isn’t interested in me. thanks :)