want to be better.
i love my bf so much as well as he loves me and we’ve been together about 10 months now. but i cant help but think im creating distance between us or messing up our rls with my uncontrollable emotions and going nonverbal for hours as a coping mechanism. are there any tips to how i could work on this?
@kvyyx
relationships do not get easier and being able to communicate with your partner is so important. People talk of how long they are together like some how they reach a point where communication is not the number one issue well I have over 3 decades and love is NOT enough.
Being able to communicate not go silent and being upset is important. Create a safe space to talk and sometimes things will hurt the other persons feelings ....but not saying it only lets the problem get worse.
@toughTiger6481 thank you so much! will definitely work much harder on communicating better and expressing issues instead of going silent.
It’s so clear how much you cherish your relationship, and it takes a lot of courage to be this honest about your struggles. Please be gentle with yourself; having intense emotions doesn't mean you are 'messing things up,' it just means you are navigating a very human experience.
Going nonverbal can be an exhausting way to cope, and I can imagine it feels lonely for you too. One thing that sometimes helps is finding a 'bridge' for those moments, maybe a simple text or a physical signal you both agree on beforehand that says, 'I’m feeling overwhelmed and need some quiet time, but I still love you.' It lets him in without forcing you to speak before you're ready.
How does your boyfriend usually react when you need that space?
@Gabrielamtineo A lot of times when i need some space he gets a bit upset as he believes he has done something wrong and i have to explain that its just me needing a moment. it does get quite lonely going nonverbal as i dont talk to anyone at all during these times. i now see that there are more simple and easier ways of communicating to him how i am feeling without upsetting him. Thank you so much for your help!
