Did I cheat?
My husband and i have been together for over 4 years, in late October of 2020 we had a huge huge fight it got bad, i took our daughter and went to crash on a friends couch, he was allowed to visit 1 a week to see our daughter other then that we didn't see much of him, divorce papers were sent and i remember having a breakdown about it, i didnt want this to end but also knew it was ending, we both swore we'd never get back together, i hooked up with my ex 2 times, it was not intentional, i felt disgusting afterwards, my husband and i got back together, (after talking and agreeing and both setting boundries) i still haven't told him because of culture and religious reasons, if he knew it would crush him, so my question is, did i cheat? I had no clue we were getting back together, especially with divorce papers
Technically speaking, no. You both established a clear cut line that you would not be getting back together and divorce papers were sent out. At that point you both were not in a romantic relationship with each other. This does not mean that it won’t hurt him and potentially cause great duress in your relationship if you choose to tell him. To simply put it: no you did not cheat, you both had established an end. He may feel as if you did and it may be worse because it was with your ex more than once.
Thank you, we've been back together for about 2 months now and our 5 year anniversary is coming up in april, i don't want to ruin everything again we're finally in a better place and due to religious reasons if i say anything my life will actually be ruined i dont want to hurt or lose him either it was a mistake and if i had a 1% clue that we were getting back together i would have never done that i just don't know how to deal with the guilt as well I'm trying to forgive myself and move on
@purpleLake4283 I would say No. You were not in a relationship and he doesnt need to know what you did when you were not in a relationship. If he found out Im sure he would get upset however, you did NOTHING WRONG. Best of luck!
Thank you, these messages are making me feel way much better honestly, its just the guilt, i feel terrible, and i dont think this should affect our marriage especially considering when we got back together we decided to let go of the past and start a fresh start
My bf and I had broken up for a little while . While i was grieving and crying over him he was out searching for his exes . I thought it was so disrespectful and very hurtful that even though we are not together , That is what he thinks about and wants to do instead of think about me or even at least make it known that he is also hurt over the separation or want to try to fix things with me . I also thought there was no chance of us getting back together but it still hurt so much knowing that while I’m breaking down over him he was acting as if he didn’t care . And we’re back together but just knowing thats what he did makes me see him completely different . I still love him but now I feel like I don’t really know him .