How to make friends

@sharkiesz

Hi there ~ ! So glad you have found this site and found the courage to ask for help! That already is very brave. You're still very young so it's not too late to start making friends. First, you have the desire to make friends and want to socialize so that already means you have something in common with almost everyone else! most people are exactly like you! They just want to have a few friends, many of them might also not be so confident, a little bit shy, and some others might be extroverted and not shy at all. But whichever case it is, they are all human and you are too, with similar situations, wants, and thoughts and feelings. So don't think of them as intimidating or anything terrifying. Most people are not cruel or mean-spirited, so they usually won't go out of their way to embarrass you if you just go up to them and introduce yourself.

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As for what to talk about, there's endless topics! Since they are all strangers to you right now, no-one knows anything about anyone, so that should mean there's literally everything to talk about right?! Maybe to start the conversation, ask them what they plan to do after Year 12. And whatever they say (no matter what it is, if its Computer Science or Robotics, or Chemistry, Engineering or anything!), ask them about that! Why do they want to study it? What do they like about that subject? But don't just ask them questions, tell them a little about yourself too! What subjects do you like? What did you find boring, which classes are you struggling in... gossip a little about your teachers! Which teacher talks too much? Which teachers do you like/dislike? Then you could talk about what their plans are for Christmas if any... talk about the Lockdown and how they feel about it... Where are they from, what's their cultures, what music do they like... What are their families like? Tell them about your culture too. And then you can talk about travel (if the borders ever open up again).. Some people usually travel before they go to University and take a gap year. Talk about their favourite show on Netflix.. Sports, Hobbies... the list goes on ~ ! 😂

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The main things are:

1) Don't be afraid of people. Mostly people are just going through a day and nothing interesting happens. When they meet someone new, that is already more interesting to them than nothing happening at all! And most people are just like you, nothing to be scared of at all ~ ! When you have this idea that there is some "wrong thing" that you can say, it makes you talk less because fear always makes conversations awkward. So don't worry too much about "saying the wrong thing".

2) Smile. Show them you're friendly and want to make friends. It's OK to be a little nervous, because you're shy and making friends can be hard. But still - smile and show them you're trying. You seem very polite so if they notice you're shy just say that - "Sorry, I'm really a bit shy, but I was wondering what everyone is doing after year 12?"

3) Try to get their contact details so that you can be friends afterwards. Or exchange social media so that there's no pressure to call each other or text or whatever.

4) Practice and you will feel it comes more naturally the more you do it. Every conversation will help you feel less afraid, more confident, and with more friends, you can ask them what they do to make friends, what they talk about, and get to know people more deeply.

All the best with this, I am sure you will build many friendships!
CatzInTheCradle