Is it me?
Hi, I'm a 38 year old woman who began dating a man a few months ago. We've had several disagreements about things that I've done. This last time I wanted to do something nice for him but I asked if he was busy before telling him what it was. He hates surprises and I only wanted to know if he was busy so I could schedule everything and let him know. He says that I should have just told him and never asked the question. He says I'm too independent and that I don't listen. He says I should just do things the way he tells me to (in regards to him), shut up and be quiet. I don't know how to just stop thinking. What do I do?
Seems to me that he is controlling. Some people like to be controlled. If you are not one of them, you have a couple4 of choices:
- stay in the relationship anyway
- sit down with him, tell him how you feel about this en make it clear what he can and what he cannot expect
- break up and you will surely meet someone who really deserves you
Remember, you don't need anyone. Just be your true self and reserve quality time with your true being.
Take care,
Seems to me like this may be your half of the story?
Because no woman would put up with that..
We can all be set in our ways by this age.
If do as you're told doesn't work for you,move on, before you become too involved..
You're just a few months in, and clearly you're unhappy enough to come to this forum to talk about it. Sometimes we need an outside voice to confirm what we've been feeling inside all along. I say cut your losses and find someone who actually enjoys listening to what you have to say. Since you haven't devoted years of your life to this person, now is the time to get out while it's still easy and you don't have heaps of memories and attachments yet.
