My boyfriend is abusive?
My boyfriend whom I’ve lived with for almost 3 years constantly criticizes me, makes fun of me, belittles me, and accuses me of cheating. He’s had a rough past so I let of it go, but he’s really suspicious of me lately and it’s making me mad. I just went down to the laundry room to get some clothes and he accused me of cheating on him (or texting someone) while in the laundry room. He got really angry and threatens to hit me, leave, get violent etc. I don’t know what to do. Is this normal? He’s always been like this. A lot of the times he is really sweet though. Maybe this is what I deserve? Maybe all men are like this? I just don’t know.
Hey I'm sorry you're going through this, it is definitely not normal all guys are not like this and I think it's time to let him know how it makes you feel because it's not fair to you especially if he's being violent or threatening you. I hope you can find some peace and resolution to the issues.
yup he's definitely abusive. if he has gotten violent before, then there's a chance he will be violent if something worse happens. please leave for ur own safety, this is not normal behavior. and i'm so sorry that u have to deal with this. not all guys are like this and the right one will treat u so much more better than this. there's a chance he could be projecting or is just super insecure, but he is most definitely abusive. you do not deserve this treatment from him,
I m so sorry you're going through that. Not all guys are like that. I was in a similar situation and trust me people like him don't deserve our empathy. It's not worth it. You have to leave. Abusive relationships mess you up. You will lose yourself while keeping up with their behavior. Your bf is suspicious because he is insecure. He criticizes you, belittles you, makes fun of you because of his insecurities. That is toxic behaviour. It gets worse. You don't deserve that. No one does but toxic people make you feel like no one can ever love you except them, that you deserve this behavior, they play victim. That is manipulation and red flags in a relationship. I can share more details. Honestly I think I can help you if you want to be helped. Message me if you feel like.
@inventiveEyes6431
inventiveEyes,
No, no, no all men are NOT like this, this is not okay what he's doing to you! This is a form of abuse and you deserve a lot better than this. This is very unhealthy and will only get worse if you stay with a man like this. You need to get far away from this person because he can potentially harm you physically and/or emotionally. He will break you down and make your life a living hell, so please, get away from him.
That is abuse. If you can, look up the cycle of abuse and see if that is familiar. In any way, your feelings are valid and he is abusive. I hope you can find safety and a situation that you deserve, because you do not deserve that. Nobody does.
Under no circumstances is abuse OK. This is definitely not normal and that's not healthy jealousy. You don't deserve abuse ever and all men are not like that (dude here). Ask him what has led him to even think that you would cheat? And if some other dude was threatening you how would he feel?
@inventiveEyes6431
I feel you and is going through the same thing, except he was never like this and he actually lay his hands on me. Makes me tell myself I deserve it from all the crap he's putting into my head.
From what I've been told no, that's not normal and not all men are like that. There are sweet ones that won't criticize you or hate on you. Then for the accusing of cheating, well there could be a chance hes cheating on you or he's very very insecure about himself. So he doesn't trust you and gonna believe that you're cheating when you're not. Because that's what I dealt with and had a child with. I left because I couldn't deal with the name-calling/ putting me down. Also I was not going to allow my daughter to watching me be a situation like that.
@inventiveEyes6431 Im going to be honest, I have a type and they are sweet bad boys that always have a complicated past. I have had abusive ones too. Unfortunalty because of those pasts they can have a hard time with handling their emotions when they become adults. HOWEVER, I want to be 100% clear, no matter what has happened to them it is NEVER okay to threaten or belittle or name call you partner, NEVER. I know first hand it can be hard to leave these situations because you love them and so you make excuses for them or you want to help them or you think they'll grow out of it. Unfortunaltly that is not the case. You deserve better, get out of this while you still have any of youself left, physically and mentally. He will take it all from you.
