aromantic but fits here best

yesterday i made the decision to talk to my mom abt my pornography use and that i was going to stop watching it which actually went very well. i did that bc i’ve been having a lot of anxiety surrounding “what if i get caught” and not only that but i feel like it’s a good decision long term to quit while i’m ahead. i thought talking to my mom abt it would get rid of my anxiety, and it did as far as that goes, but my brain just found a new thing to latch on to. now i’m anxious abt my friendship with my best friend. we’re both aromantic and we have a sexual relationship but my friendship with him outside of that is as healthy as possible because we’re both healthy people. we prioritize ourselves as well as each other and nobody is dependent but we both feel loved and supported. our sexual relationship is the same way. it’s extremely genuine and realistic, and makes me feel closer to him and hopefully vice versa. i know logically that the sexual aspect of our friendship isn’t unhealthy, but i keep feeling anxious abt it. even in the worst case scenario (an unrealistic one) where i felt like it was unhealthy for myself or both of us and told him i couldn’t continue our sexual interaction, he would completely understand and respect that and it wouldn’t change anything in our friendship whatsoever. i still just feel anxious no matter what i do. i talked to him abt it which helped a little bit but i’m still feeling very strange. i know that getting rid of porn is a big lifestyle change and i don’t do too well with change, i always have a lot of anxiety surrounding any change. i also know that i have a bad track record with losing best friends but the difference is that they weren’t really healthy people, and all of those friendships were ultimately ruined by some type of romantic thing whether between us or between them and someone else. i don’t have to worry abt that with him which does help quite a bit. he’s been so kind and reassuring thru all of this and i don’t wanna make it seem like he’s doing something to make me feel anxiety around our friendship. i think it’ll pass eventually but it’s really difficult now and i honestly don’t know how to deal with it altho i’m doing my best