complicated friend
hi,
i have a friend who stuggles with depression and problems with self-esteem. We often face problems as i dont know how to handle her issues or help them. I have tried to explain how im not good at handling these sorts of things but still care for them very deeply. They, however, always gets mad at me for not meeting their expectations. I definitely have made some mistakes, but i always apologize and explain why i did what i did.
They seem to understand me and our attempts to communicate these issues always end up with her being bitter even though i try to handle them maturely.
This whole situation is starting to affect my mental well being, and i feel like they are always mad at me.
What can i do? They dont want help and turn away when i try helping because i don’t know how to. I feel like they are acting immature and cant accept my flaws.
You are trying to help, and that's good,
And that is what I would do and keep trying,
As we cannot sit and watch the people we love and care for being sad and helpless.
But on the flip side, one cannot help another if the person doesn't want to be helped
All we can do is keep trying not by constantly asking them but having a conversation, understand the reason behind
But don't stop trying, because that is what people don't have and don't know they need, the support of your loved ones...
@lavenderStrawberries989
Hi there--here are a couple resources I was able to find that have some tips for how to help a person who is suffering from depression.
https://www.verywellmind.com/how-to-help-someone-with-depression-1065117
https://health.clevelandclinic.org/6-dos-and-donts-for-supporting-someone-who-has-depression/
A couple things I've personally found helpful in my own experience talking with depressed people on this site:
1) Take care of yourself, understand what your own personal limits/boundaries are (i.e. have I agreed to this and am I okay with this?), communicate and enforce limits if needed, and don't push yourself beyond what you are comfortable doing.
2) Prioritize empathy and non-judgmentality over trying to fix things; often people don't want help or advice so much as just an ear. And sometimes there really isn't an easy solution or simple way of fixing it.