need anyone's opinion
Hey, I don’t even know where to start. Last year, I was in a talking stage with this guy for just 7 days. Then I told him I couldn’t continue texting him, I had my own reasons. He was really hurt because he was starting to trust me, and after I told him I couldn’t go on, he asked me twice to think about it again. But I didn’t change my mind. Honestly, I wasn’t that attached since we only talked for a week. After a few months, I realized I had made the wrong choice and I regretted it. I begged him to come back and give me another chance to make things right. And he did. It’s been 5 months since then, and honestly a lot has happened. At first, he seemed so in love with me. He would buy me food every time he went out, even though I told him not to. He’d get me medicine immediately when I was sick. He was really nice to me. But as time went on, he slowly changed. He’s not the same anymore. Now, it feels like I have to listen to everything he says. I even abandoned my friends for him. If I don’t do what he wants, he gets mad at me, like I’ve done something huge that could make us break up. I can’t even make small mistakes, not even by accident, because he’ll ignore me for days, barely text me, or completely change his behavior. He curses at me like it’s nothing, and when I bring it up, he says, “That’s just how I talk when I’m comfortable with you". I also can’t correct him when he’s wrong. Once, I tried because I was jealous, he was talking about another girl, even complimenting her. I told him not to say things like that, but he got mad and asked me, “You can’t take a joke?” Even after that, he kept doing it, talking about other girls, complimenting them, even when they were wearing revealing clothes. Then there was this time I found out he searched for illegal videos on Google. When I confronted him, he said it was his friend who searched it. But when it happened, he was holding his phone. If it was really his friend, he should’ve told me earlier that someone borrowed his phone but he didn’t. I only found out days later. And now I don’t even know if I should trust him or not.
be honest, do I really deserve this? because I hurt him once before?
( i rarely talk with people about my problem so I'm sorry if its hard to understand what im talking about )
@saszsa Thank you for being brave and sharing this — it’s not easy to put these things into words. I’ll be direct: you d
o not deserve to be treated this way.
@saszsa
Hiya. Thanks for reaching out.
Sorry to hear how he’s been treating you. I don’t think anyone deserves to be treated like that, but it’s up to you to put boundaries in place. Without boundaries you’ll receive no respect in the relationship.
You spent a week talking to him at the beginning and stopped. That's not an issue to feel guilty about. Not at all. So stop that.
Nor does it allow him to treat you as he has done. He love bombed you and he is showing his true self. I suspect you felt a bit of that at the beginning and maybe in part why you stopped after a week.
You feelings are valid as are your boundaries and it seems at the moment they are being stomped on.
You shouldn't be on egg shells in a relationship.
It seems you tried communicating but at some point if it's not working and he doesn't want to work on the relationship then only option is break up.
Respect yourself and be kind to yourself too.
Continue to reach out if need be .