Any survivors who participate in BDSM?

I'm a submissive and I don't have much experience (quite the understatement, actually... I barely have any).

A few days ago, I was having intercourse for the first time with my dom (and my first time having intercourse... ever) and I noticed that there came a point where he was getting aggressive... and more aggressive than how he would be when we did sexual stuff in the past.

We never had a conversation about safe words and limits and such. And I heard from other people in the community that that conversation is supposed to happen, but I didn't know that at the time. Like I said, I have no experience. He, on the other hand, is years older than me and does have a lot of experience.

I guess the first sign should've been when he entered me (without warning) without a condom, when I made it clear that he wasn't allowed to enter me without a condom. He made an excuse, said that he was just 'teasing me.' Then he put the condom on and we continued. It ws fine for a little bit. Then, we took the condom off so that I could go down on him. We start kissing and he enters me again without warning and without a condom and he pressures me to ride him. After a bit, it started to hurt and I told him that, but he told me to keep going and that it was okay, even asked me to go as deep as I could, which wasn't very far. I asked him to stop so that we could take a break and he did. For a few seconds. After those few seconds, he said "I'm tired of waiting," and he put it back in.

After a while, we were laying next to each other and we started making out. He then fingers me, which felt good at first, and I orgasmed. He started fingering me again. The area was sensitive and I was still in pain from before so I asked him to stop. He didn't. In fact, when I told him that it was sensitive, he replied with "That's exactly why I should keep going." I came a second time. He went in for a third.

I was in pain at this point and I really wanted him to stop so I said "No", and he responded with "Yes" and went ahead anyway. And every time I would say no, he would answer back with "yes," and go even harder. I came a third time. Then he went for a fourth.

Again, I begged him to stop, told him no. And he looked me in the eyes and said "your mouth says no, but your face says yes. you know you don't want me to stop,' before covering my mouth with his free hand. I tried to squirm and push his hand away but to no avail. I came a fourth time. He moved his hand and it seemed like he was down with me. But he wasn't.

He grabbed me by my ankles and positioned me so that he could enter me from behind, which he did. He then placed me over his knees and fingered me again, covering my mouth.

After that, it was kind of a blur.

At the end of everything, we kinda went about as normal. We cuddled and watched a movie. But the whole time, I couldn't help thinking "um... something about this wasn't right", but I just brushed it off as "he's a dom, that's part of the roleplay."

But then I talked to some people in a bdsm group, asking about the situation, and they were like "yeah no that was not okay. if you guys were doing that kind of roleplay, there needs to have been a conversation about it first. he took advantage of the fact that you're new."

So idk what to think. Anyone who could give me advice or who has experience with this type of thing? If you want, you could even share your story? Idk, I just feel kind of alone right now.