Haven't been turned on in over 3 years (TW)
So I haven't had any sex since 2015 when my FWB became my sexual assaulter. Since then I just haven't been turned on basically ever. My "sex" dreams don't go past making out, I can't masturbate to climax and if I try it feels like I am forcing it and I get very overwhelmed and uncomfortable. In general, I just don't feel horny ever.
I've been going through depression and anxiety since before that incident and I know they can both be a factor, but even when I am feeling my best mentally there is zero sexual desire. It's not an absence of feeling attracted to someone because I can still feel attraction towards people, but it's never sexual. So I'm kind of at a lost of what could be happening and if it is just my depression fighting it or something else.
@Meech1619
Seems like you're traumatized.
Maybe you developed a bad relationship with sex, when you try your brain subconsciously is taken to that accident and you can't do it.
Do you think what I'm saying applies?
@Booklover95
That's what I have been thinking but idk talk myself out of it I guess
@Meech1619 You don't have to pressure yourself into becoming sexual again. I believe you need to come to terms with what happened to you first. Trauma from assault is an awful thing to process, but that's why it's the more important to give yourself little reminders:
-What happened to you wasn't your fault
-Your current sex-repulsion doesn't make you broken or wrong
-You don't have to be sexual to be valid and loved
-You're still a whole person full of worth
You can own your sexuality - but accepting your experiences and views of sex as they are now is a part of it, too. All in all, just give yourself some patience, and some time to breathe.
