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Unsatisfied

User Profile: writerchick88
writerchick88 February 9th, 2017

I'm finding myself becoming less satisfied with masturbating.

Something will turn me on enough to take care of it (instead of ignoring it/cooling off), I'll get out my toy and settle down for some porn. I'm turned on for a bit but I find if I try to draw it out for too long, I get...bored and just bring out the vibrator to finish myself off- and the orgasm never lasts more than a few seconds.

Then it's over and I feel unsatisfied and that I've done something wrong.

5
User Profile: SentryTheDefiant
SentryTheDefiant February 9th, 2017

Variety can help when you feel like you're just finishing off to get it over and done with. Looking at different kinds of porn or trying something more interactive (chat/cam) can sometimes help you get more excited. Also I find that taking longer breaks between sessions can really help too, the difference between doing it every day vs every 3 days or more can be quite big with the "ending".

I think if you're drawing it out to the point where you're trying to watch something you want to finish to rather than finishing when your body is ready, that can really effect the end quality and it can be quite unsatisfying and dull. From what I've read on the issue orgams are generally at their most powerful relative to your excitment at around the 5 minutes mark.

User Profile: CuriousTeddy
CuriousTeddy February 24th, 2017

Sometimes taking a week off helps. The longer the better :)

User Profile: HopeHaddingMSWLCSW
HopeHaddingMSWLCSW March 11th, 2017

When it comes to masturbation you have to think about yourself as your sexual partner. What do you want? What are your fantasies? What would you like to experiment with? Plan a date night with yourself. Set the mood and music and dedicate an hour of time with no interuptions. Decide to NOT have an orgasm. Spend time touching and exploring yourself just to touch and explore. Do not focus on having an orgasm at all. There are a lot of other things you can do to help in this area. The important thing is to find out what works for you!

User Profile: bowserforpresident
bowserforpresident May 1st, 2018

I admit that I'm not certain how to respond this, but it also feels like I really relate to it.

I don't know if this helps you, or something you'd like to consider, but for me I found that in feeling sexual desire, lust or otherwise, what I felt I was lacking (and didn't know how to get it, so I turned to masturbation and porn) was connection with someone else. Whether through boredom, or loneliness, or excitement, or whatever, I mostly just wanted to feel something other than the emptiness inside.

I don't know what drives you to masturbation, if it's just something to do because you feel an inch, or how pornography helps you (for whatever excitement you get from it, or what type drives you or whatever), but if it sounds relatable to you, for my own experience, I encourage you to reach out and just talk to somebody. It doesn't have to be sexual or about what you're feeling. I guess it could go that way, either one, but someone with whom to relate, that likes similar things or lives a similar way or something. I don't know. It's helped me a bit.

1 reply
User Profile: RockSolid22
RockSolid22 July 31st, 2018

@bowserforpresident

I'm feeling the same way. I'm not getting anything to satisfy the loneliness and emptiness I feel. I think being with someone intimately will help to release these sexual feelings in a positive way that masturbation just can't. I'm going to test out this theory and hopefully it'll help!

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