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feeling confused

User Profile: HiMisterKyle
HiMisterKyle February 2nd, 2017

I've had sex for the first time recently and I don't know. I was a Virgin for so long that porn became my life and I even have a few sex toys. Now that I've had sex recently I feel disappointed. I couldn't climax . Since my first time It's harder to climax to porn now. I don't know what to do. Both porn and actually sex feel dull. This is kinda freaking me out

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User Profile: Kutless
Kutless February 2nd, 2017

@HiMisterKyle

Thank you for reaching out! I think what you are experiencing is normal. If you maybe take a break, things might improve. Maybe you could connect with me or another listener for suggestions

User Profile: HopeHaddingMSWLCSW
HopeHaddingMSWLCSW March 11th, 2017

It is not uncommon for first sexual experiences to be awkward, stressed, or just plain bad. This has a lot to do with how sex is viewed, your previous exposure to sex and sexual materials, and your expectations about sex. All these things can combine to create a perfect storm of not perfect sex. The disappointment you feel with later sexual acts can reflect the disappointment you felt with the initial sexual encounter. Seeking someone to talk to about these issues may help. You can also review your expectations and determine if they were realistic or based on porn ideals. More than a few people have had this happen!

2 replies
User Profile: tallHemlock5534
tallHemlock5534 March 11th, 2017

@HopeHaddingMSWLCSW but i do think im asexual but not sure.

1 reply
User Profile: HopeHaddingMSWLCSW
HopeHaddingMSWLCSW March 12th, 2017

@tallHemlock5534 If you're asexual that's perfectly normal. There are a lot of asexual people out there. They even have their own dating sites! Have you researched and looked into joining an asexual community?

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User Profile: Redrose0310
Redrose0310 March 15th, 2017

@HiMisterKyle It's been said that porn can alter how are brains thinks of sex. With that being said and I have the same problem, take a break from watching pron. When exploring your own body you know where to hit the right spots for you. Trying talking to your partner about it and during sex voice where it feels good to you.