Broken engagement
Hello everyone, I am going through a really rough season in my life right now. I am 33 years old. My 14 year relationship ended with my ex-fiance 10 months ago. He was going on multiple trips to Thailand and was cheating on me with prostitutes since 2023. This is really hard for me to cope with because I loved him so much and he promised me he would never cheat on me. During the beginning of my relationship when we were still talking/getting to know each other, I opened up to him about my childhood trauma. I was sexually abused as a kid by two men. Growing up, all I ever really yearned for was to find a sincere and genuine relationship. But I feel like I haven't had much luck with finding the one.
I did try dating apps for a while and met this guy on there. We hit it off and would talk on the phone almost every day. We met up in person four times and have been intimate with each other. However, over time since the last meetup I noticed we were talking less. He would tell me I can call him anytime but that if he doesn't answer that I shouldn't take it personally. He is not easily reachable. I've called many times where he didn't pick up and I don't hear from him until several days later. Maybe his interest fizzled out and he got bored of me? It's disappointing because i genuinely liked him and saw potential in developing something long-term but he said he's not really into boyfriend/girlfriend labels and is fine with what we have currently. He wants to keep things casual and it feels like he was only after one thing.
I feel like I will never find a true genuine life-long partner. I am afraid I am going to grow old alone...no family of my own... no partner to share my life with. It is very depressing. It is hard for me to sleep at night because of the empty space beside me. I yearn for hugs that no one can give me now. I don't know how to cope with this, I am struggling to rebuild my life from the ground up.
@friendlyJet1330
This is hard now but you deserve better than someone who lies.
Disrespects you.
Cheats on you.
Makes no effort.
Is unreachable.
It hurts but healing can take place and you can find someone who gives you what you need 💙
Helllo @friendlyJet1330 !
I'm very sorry that you are going through all of this. I'd like you to know that your ex-fiancé cheating on you isn't your fault at all; his actions say everything about him and nothing about who you are as a person!
You aren't broken or anything, you are healing. You want real love, and you absolutely deserve it. Keep on going, take care of yourself, and stay safe!
@friendlyJet1330
I’m really sorry you’re going through all of this. With a long relationship ending like that, especially when betrayal was involved, is incredibly painful and can shake your whole world. It also makes sense that this is bringing up a lot of grief and loneliness for you right now. However, none of this means should mean that you won’t find a genuine, loving partner in the future. I hope you’re able to give yourself care through this. Take care.<3 
@friendlyJet1330 Thank you for trusting us with something so deeply personal. It sounds like you've been carrying an incredible amount of hurt—from the trauma you experienced as a child, to the betrayal after a 14-year relationship, and now the disappointment of someone you hoped might become a meaningful partner. It's understandable that all of this would leave you feeling lonely, discouraged, and worried about the future.
From what you've shared, it also sounds like the man you recently met may not be looking for the same kind of relationship you want, and that mismatch can be really painful when you're hoping for something genuine and lasting.
You mentioned that the empty space beside you at night feels especially difficult. Can you tell me more about what those moments are like for you? I'm here to listen, and you don't have to go through these feelings alone.
@friendlyJet1330
I am really sorry you are going through all this, I know this is hard time in your life but remember it isn't your fault someone else isn't loyal or accountable. Don't allow such thoughts to come in your mind. You don't deserve this and when time reaches you will get all your dreams done. Just hang on till then don't lose hope ♥️
