Cross roads ahead v2
So.. My wife and I are having a rough time lately. We have been married now for 3 years together for 5. She is from America and I'm.l English both late 30s. We used to be so close talk kiss hug make love (most days), be all around attracted to each other. Yes we argued what couple doesn't but we always made up (usually me saying sorry first). But the past year has been rough we've had sex 3 times in a year, she doesn't want me to touch her in bed as she says I'm always horny. (she's not wrong but I control myself). We don't speak really now and I try to make conversations but they fall on deaths door. She doesn't really like to be around me as she now says I'm over bearing and controlling.( I do admit I do try to help in anyway I can, I can see if it's over bearing there) But she always said she wants someone to provide for her take care and do things for her. I work all week, cook clean about nearly everything that needs doing I do. She doesn't work or do any house work. When she does I'm so grateful as it saves me doing it. And I let her know it. Everyday I call her beautiful, tell her I love her I try to make moves on her but nothing. Especially recently I can't do anything without her being annoyed with me. She calls me an ass hole everyday pretty much. I apologise most days feel like crap, falling deeper inside myself I don't know what to do. Well today our new puppy peed on the sofa and she was cleaning it up. I asked does she need a hand and she flipped she called me an asshole, said she hates the way I speak it irritates her. How I pronounce words she hates them. She walks off I apologise as I do, but nothing every day I'm feeling lower and lower. I love this women but she hurts me so much. I've been in a hurtful relationship before I know how it feels. Today has been a low tho as I've been showing my emotions in my face and I can see her rolling her eyes pissed at me. I'm so lost. I couldn't sleep tonight so I decided to let her sleep and I'd get up and buy her some birthday presents. She wakes up and comes and sees me on the pc and says are you kidding me. Pissed off at me I tell her I can't sleep I've got things on my mind and she says stop being so moppy and emotional. She goes back to bed and tells me to sleep on the sofa. What am I meant to do? Act like a man and be an asshole? Be emotional and get walked on? I'm so lost. She's always wanted a man to show his emotions so I Do and she gets angry at the slightest thing. Or do I go into my shell and keep things from her but get called a liar when I don't tell her I'm feeling down. (she does this alot)
@crimsonEyes1140 Sorry to here this.
Maybe try talking ti a listener here at 7cups.
I hope this helps.
Hi @crimsonEyes1140, I’m really sorry you are experiencing such a difficult situation. I understand that you love her, maybe you shouldn’t give up on that relationship. She seems to have high standards (a man that provides, that treats her like a princess). The question is, was she always like that or that change came out of the blue? If I were you I would try to put myself in her place. Is there something that you did at some point that made her hold some grudge against you? We’re you, yourself, a different person at the beginning of your relationship? Regarding her personal life, do you think things at work, etc., are working out for her? Her health? Her possible frustrations. Give this a good thought. Try to be more empathetic in order to try to figure out what’s going on with you guys. Is it routine or lack of romance. A woman’s mind can be a mysterious place, believe. Yet, she is still with you, for better or for worse. That means something, I’m sure. This is just my humble advice and please don’t take offense. I really feel for you and that’s no way of treating a partner. You are a victim, one way or the other. But before making a move, do some introspection. I believe it will help you understand things better. Hoping for you guys to be a happy couple again, I wish you all the best. A hug 🤗
Thank you for this and reading this has helped its made me think about afew things. She said she always wanted to be treated like a princess, so that's what I always aimed to do. Maybe I was happier when we first started out I had no money worries and such now I worry alot. Our home life with neighbours has gotten worse and she doesn't work so she had to deal with them everyday whilst I go to work. I am going to really think about her frustrations yeah. I'll try and work it out with her. I love her and I know she loves me. Today she is speaking to me and she has tried to explain afew things. I'll take it slow with her. She does mean everything to me.
