How to move on from an affair

My story...

I had an affair and I know it's wrong. It was short and only gone out couple of times. We were both married but we felt something good for each other. We tried few times to stop but since we were working together, we didn't succeed. We ended up getting back together. He left the company but we still tried to continue. I think we became closer, we communicate more. Until the last message he told me that his wife was suspecting something so he needs to keep silent and will contact me again.

Well, he never did. Almost a year now. I know I'm just stupid to expect. My problem is, it was hard to move on. I need to talk and see him at least one last time. At this time, I should have move on. But everyday, I still miss him. It still hurt. I don't understand why I can't move on, it's been a while.

I have no one to share this because it's embarrasing, it's wrong.

Sorry this is long. I just want to share and hear someone tells me something.