Hurt and confused

Im new to this and needed to seek out something that may help me. I am awaiting counseling but in the mean time this may help.

My relationship of 7 years ended 43 days ago. We have a child together and I have a child who is now a legal adult from a previous relationship. I am still in love with my ex and he is unsure of his feelings. He ia currently seeing someone, a mutual friend which kills me. We still talk and will be in eachothers life because of our child. I agree we were in a bad place and seperating was not a bad thing we both have things to work on. But i never thought this woukd actually be the end of us. He could be in a rebound and might not last, but what if.... I am so lost. so much has happened and we have done and said so many bad things to each other. I did a sad thing by pleading to him, begging almost asking for us to have a second chance. We cant live together and we need to go slow we do have problems. But i always believed if love was there the ...there is a chance right? After i said my peace knowing it could and probably was a waste of breathe but had to at least say what I needed to know that i told him all that was in my mind and in my heart. He said little too late and that i shouldnt of waited so long to open up. And he is right that i should of opened up years ago. He said 2 days ago that he isnt making any promises but will see. But he is still seeing the other woman. We talk and flirt and i know i shouldnt...im so lost