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I am talking to this guy who I am friends with and whom we shared our mutual feelings together early this year. He is in the military and is currently deployed.
Recently, he hasnt been messaging me (due to the fact that he always tell me that he will be missing in action from me for awhile so that I will miss him and stuff... you know how some guys are). Anyway, I kind of said hello and asked how he was and we started to text each other again like before and suddenly he asked me if we could give each other some space because I am a distraction (with a hahahaha in his text). Tbh, I was shocked because we are not even together. We are just friends and he told me that?
Anyway, I said sure. And he was shocked saying why does it seem like that is easy for me. I basically told him that I am easy to talk to (if he doesnt want then sure. Because basically it shows that I dont give a care about him. PS: the reason why I am showing him this because his ego is just so big. He thinks every girl is onto him and such). I asked him why? Do you want me to get angry at you?. He replied with a yes but with a joke and a hahahaha in the text.
Anyway, I asked him joke or for real? And he said for now, its for real and told me that he will text me after deployment. And we basically said our byes then and there. He said bye for now and I said bye for who knows how long. And now I decided to not reply or text him EVER. What are your thoughts about this?
@Invulnerablestate You're right. I knew a guy who did something similar to this to a friend. He'd pull away and say he wasn't good enough, she was too good for him, he wanted something different in a relationship (they were together but he couldn't decide to actually COMMIT). In retrospect he was emotionally immature and my friend really wanted something from him that he just wasn't ready to give to her. She also wouldn't let him go (unlike you) so this needlessly dragged on and on for years.
Point being is that if you don't think it's worth it, that's totally up to you. My thought is that he's busy playing headgames and thought you'd come running. Not worth your time.
@ReadBooksDrinkTea I am actually tempted to tell him frankly to tell me upfront and be a grown man if he want this to be over with because I am so much game for that and to tell him that I deserve much better. But my friends are telling me not to do it because it would make it look like I was bitter. What do you think?
@Invulnerablestate I mean, it's up to you. You can't control how others will perceive it or how he'll tell HIS side of the story. But if he told you you were a distraction (or if I misunderstood and he said HE was the distraction) then you've got the words. Either way it seems he's not sure what he wants and if he was upset when you told him "fine, whatever" then it's him who needs to make up his mind, not you.
It seems you know what you want and/or at least what you DON'T want to waste your time with, which is perfectly well within your rights. You don't want to deal with this, you two are not actually together, etc. what is there to be "bitter" to be about?
I can only say this as a total stranger who is looking at this from the outside but your posts/comments don't seem wishy washy at all. There's always the possibility you could go overboard but it also sounds like he genuinely deserves a talking to (not that he's entitled to your time or anything). I honestly don't think you seem bitter.
@ReadBooksDrinkTea Thanks! It