Letting go

How difficult it is to write in the past. You were my first boyfriend, my first true love. We last 6 years what seems like a lot. However, now I am here writing a letter that I will never give you and with my heart broken. I guess I do it to free myself, I do not know. We were supposed to be together forever or at least I thought about it. We were going to be happy to have all the animals we dream of getting married to have children and the whole story. But today I realize that it is not so, just as one imagines and not only because you left me but because I realized that the stage had to be closed, I want different things and I love you so much that I It seems unfair to drag yourself with me or force you as many times I did.

I do not hate you and I do not have a grudge I will never have it because you are one of the best people I met in my life, always happy, with many friends, you were for me etc. Although capable I did not show you everything I felt as I should have done (sorry). I wish you all the happiness of the world and at the same time I want horrible things because I am still angry. I did not see it coming and it seems unfair that you did not tell me that something was wrong with you, with us. It also makes me angry that you have not fought for the relationship that cost us so much to build and after everything we have together because love is something that never went away. I would love to understand you, but I can not and I apologize for that.

But anyway I value what we had as many people do not manage to have a month as happy as we were in the 6 years in his life. I stay with the memories, with the happy stages that we live and also with the sad ones because we knew how to be for each other and to support each other 100%. I am proud of what we had and although today I am devastated I hope I can be there for you in some future as I always did. I am also happy with everything that grew up with you because I feel we are empowered as people and that makes me very happy because we let ourselves be and had an incredibly healthy relationship. The funniest thing is that you value the most elementary things at the end of the day and I'm not going to tell you that what I'm going to miss the most is being in an all inclusive hotel with you or going to dinner at the finest restaurant in the city.

What I miss most is everything we had, our words that nobody knew, our going to the movies, laughing or just waking up and knowing that you are hugging me making me feel the safest woman in the world. Today I embrace all those moments and more and even though I cry without consolation and do not want to leave my bed I will do it because the world is not going to stop me. All this will serve to make me stronger than I am and keep growing as a person. And I release you, I release you and from the deepest part of my heart I wish you the best in life because you deserve it. And if for some reason, destiny wants us to come together like this, it will be in some future.