Nervous about confronting partner
Hello!
I’m looking for some support or guidance about bringing up an issue with my husband. I apologize if this gets a bit confusing or long.
We have been together 10 years. For background purposes, my husband is a “furry”. He doesn’t dress up or have a persona (that i know of) and I was under the impression this was just his porn preference. I’ve always known this about him, but it does not appeal to me and I’ve just let it be because It didn’t have any impact on our relationship.
My husband has broken my trust in other ways in the past. I still have anxiety about him being unfaithful and sometimes my urge to snoop through his messages gets the better of me. I recently looked through a message chain with his ex gf. She is also a furry and she had sent him a link to a furry artist’s Facebook page. My gut reaction is that this “wrong”. But it’s such a weird situation I don’t really know who to turn to for help. Idk if this was meant to be sexual in nature or if it’s something else. I feel so out of the loop about this part of his life, but I wanted to give him the space to be that side of himself. But what is he actually doing? Is he like role playing with other people or sharing sexual content with his friends/exs??
I haven’t been able to focus on much else. I am also so afraid of bringing it up with him because I should not have looked at his messages. I also don’t know if I’m ready to hear his response :/
Thank you if you’ve read this far. I am not totally sure what I am looking for here. How would I begin to approach this?
@considerateBeach4409
Hello, it's really a tricky situation you are in right now. But you already know about this, the question is, what do you want to do with it?
From your chat, I can tell a part of you desperately wants to know but another part would rather you don't. But you are obviously hurting from not knowing, continuing to turn a blind eye will not make you happy or help your relationship.
Since you know that is who he is, will you like to know more about it just to be part of that side of him or do you want to know just to find a way to make him stop being that person?
If you want to support him and know everything about him, there are Couple Truth, dare or flirt cards on Amazon that you can buy and make him spill all truths without you confronting him. There are those cards called "Our moments" too. You can buy either from Amazon, you both play it. It usually have questions about sex fantasies and desires on them.
Confronting him head on wouldn't be cool because he will find out you have been snooping around which would Marr d trust he has on you.
Think about it and make your decision. Also feel free to chat anytime.
Sending you All my Love and Support.
