@adaptableDl94
Hey there, hopefully you are doing well. There's a few things I would like to point out;
Hi, Ive been seeing someone now for 4 months. We work together so currently see each other everyday in the week but only after work maybe once and then see each other every other weekend roughly. This is because she is not from this area and travels back home to see her family some weekends. Things are going well we get on like a house on fire and have many things in common. Over the past few weeks Ive noticed shes been very hesitant in making future plans eg we were meant to book a holiday together and she now has cold feet over this. (This is starting to sound like she is starting to back away and feel different about how things are going.) This made me a think and I asked her about were do you see this going in the future. (I understand that you felt anxiety and afraid of the future since she didn't commit to the plans, however asking her something like this when she isn't ready can make her feel the pressure of a relationship, and then she will back away) She relied by saying she cant commit because she doesnt know we she wants to be at the moment (This sounds like an excuse to me, but its her way to tell you to slow things down between you two) as shes currently living down here but most of her friends and family live where shes from. She is also someone who has been hurt in the past.(This will definetly cause to have a closeness issue, which means if things go well between you two then she will start putting space. This will also make her put you in at an arm length because of the trust issues.) What should I do if she cant currently commit to anything in the future, (I can understand how scary it can be, but you are trying to force things to soothe your anxiety) do I cut my ties with it now to save emotionally investing anymore or do I see how it pans out and could end up working and then being in a relationship ?? (The only way a relationship could happen its if she is ready to be in one with you, however you are communicating to her that you want this more than her, so it will make her not commit to plans or consider a relationship with you. It's important to bring your interest level to match her, and come from a place of reciprocating her feelings)