Unlovable
What if nobody ever loves me? I'm 20 years old & I've never had a boyfriend. I just don't appeal to men. When I try to talk to people about this they say you just have had the right person come your way yet, but that's because no person comes my way. What if some people can't be loved? What if I am one of those people? What if no one ever wants me, why would they I guess?
@dapperLime2382
Hi. Thank you for posting. Sounds like you are having some real doubts about being lived right now.
I am just wondering if these are new feelings or have you been feeling like this for a while?
I am a verified listener her so feel free to message me or reply to this whichever you would feel most comfortable with.
take care
paul
@dapperLime2382 I experience the same feelings. No one wanted to date me in high school (at all....couldn't even get dates to dances). I didn't have my first relationship until I was in college. I am now almost 30 and that relationship that started 11 years ago may be coming to an end. I am terrified of restarting at 30, and I am afraid of ending up alone. But it helps to remind myself that it's just my brain playing tricks on me. The vast majority of people do not end up alone. It may seem like you're unlovable and will never find anyone, but with so many people in the world, we have to remind ourselves that the odds are slim that we won't find someone someday! In the meantime, it sounds like both of us need to work at loving ourselves first. If you don't think you deserve love and can't love yourself, why would someone else? Figure out what makes you, you. Figure out what you love and are passionate about. Join groups with other people passionate about the same things. Who knows, maybe you'll meet someone once you take the steps to love yourself first!
@Avantgardenx I know you're right. And I am working on me, but then something will happen that makes me doubt everything I've done so far. While the majority of people do find someone, what if I am the minority? Thank you for your words, they helped remind me that for right now maybe I am enough. And good luck to you and your future. I can tell from just your few kind words that it will be amazing.
@dapperLime2382 I know exactly how you feel I'm a 21 year old male and I've only ever been in a relationship once in highschool for 2 months and that was the stupidest thing I ever did. But ever since I haven't been able to find someone who would love me.
@dapperLime2382 I too have recently reached the same conclusion. I am completely and utterly fed up of trying anymore.
Even the unloveable find partners.
But anyway, you are only 20 and have the rest of your life to find your soulmate. Why the rush?
Good things come to those who wait. Meanwhile you can focus on yourself and try to be more loveable by working on your self esteem, loving and taking care of yourself, being happy
Everyone deserves to be loved.