We

@gingrr

Hey there, hopefully you are doing well. There's a few things I would like to point out;

Ive been with my boyfriend for a year and 9 months. We were friends before that for 2 years. We got together very soon after his last relationship. We love each other, we really do, but he has a thing for lying. (This is a red flag right here) Little white lies that dont matter but that i notice. (This indicates he rather lies, than to be honest because in the past is what saved him from getting punished, another person getting mad at him or from a withdrawal of love)Sometimes its to me sometimes his family, either way i always notice. (He learned this behavior from his family and his experiences in life) In the past weve had problems with him and his ex, hell do little things that he knows i dont like but says he cant help. (He says "he can't help it" to distort reality and to not take blame for his action. I also believe he might be using trigulation so he wouldn't feel too close with you) If its not that its him talking to random girls i feel is in a flirty way. (This is definetly trigulation, he knows unconciously that this will push you away, so he keeps the other person to go back and forth on order to not feel close with you or the other people) More recently i found out a person he was texting was actually a girl under a guys contact name. (This tells me it could be his ex or someone he talks in a flirty way, so puts a guy name so you wouldn't find out who this other person is) It was no big deal because they were just playing a imessage game. (Yeah sureeeee) But the lying about it is what i had a problem with, not the game. I know he loves me (I have my doubts about this) but he blames it on him being young and stupid (This is his way to take responsability for his actions, to push it under the rug and to distort reality. I don't believe his words, the way he blames it on other things and not himself communicates he doesn't have the ability to admit he is wrong, so this is going to cause a lot of problems in the relationship) which is true but i dont know whether itll only get worse as time goes(It will get worst because this is a behavior he tends to push it under the rug) by or if i should give him the benefit of the doubt since they are small things. (They are huge things)