What am I supposed to do?

Hey @raebossum, *sits with you*

I appreciate you for reaching out in 7 cups, it's hard to feel confused and lost in a relationship, more so when we only have care and love for someone, just unable to express it to the person.

I hear your partner is struggling with something personal, as their significant other, it is valid for you to feel the need to be there with them, as well as support them and ease their problems as much as you can. It just makes you the kind, caring, thoughtful partner that you are, who's concerned about being unable to do much in a certain situation.

I get how your partner trusting someone else with their problems, and reaching out to someone else before you, could feel stinging, especially when it's someone you're not very confident about being in your partner's life. It is okay to feel hurt, I'd feel the same being in your place, where it just feels helpless and confusing. But yes, it's perhaps normal sometimes to not feel super eased about sharing certain things, and taking time with it.

From my experience as a listener here, I'd like to assure you, sometimes people do not need advice or direct solutions for their problems, sometimes it is okay to just be there with them, hold their hand in silence, if that's what they'd prefer at the moment and assure them how you're there with them and they can share anything with you, even if you're unable to solve something completely, you could listen and be there to make them feel less alone with what they're going through, and that sure helps in lightening a burden and feeling heard and supported.

Sometimes when I don't know the best thing to say to someone, I like to ask them what is it that will help them the most at this time/ what would they like to hear/ do in that very moment. Chances are, people tell us what might help them, and then we can do accordingly, without fussing over much.

I feel, there's two important things in a relationship, specially when things aren't going too well, communication and space, a balance between the two, has the potential to make alot of difference for both people involved. What are your thoughts, about asking them, if they'd like to talk about something, and assuring them that you're ready to support them through, at their pace, just that they are always welcome to talk to you about anything they need/ want to? 😊

Then slowly, once they start opening up a little more, it could be an option to tell them about your feelings too.

You and your feelings hold equal value as their, it is and always should be okay to express yourself, and be open about how you're feeling, or when something is bothering you, sometimes the hesitation about things getting worse is there which is pretty understandable...just a little ahead of any of these likely honest-open-direct conversations though, lies strength and more trust which will only help y'all feel more connected and confident in the relationship, which you my friend, deserve wholeheartedly. ❤

Offering hugssss!