Idk if I should continue with him
We've been very close friends for more than 2 yrs. At some points I thought I liked him but just ignored those feelings because it would get too troublesome if things didn't work out for us. 6 months later, I thought I had gotten over it until I misunderstood he liked someone. He was just trying to confess to me indirectly, but I misunderstood and at that moment I was sure I liked him: it was something beyond simple jealousy. I felt betrayed.
One week later, he confessed to me and I got confused, but I think it was a happy kind of confused. I said I liked him too but didn't want a serious relationship. That was 1 month ago, and now I think I don't like him. I don't feel anymore towards him besides anxiety; it is my first relationship and I didn't think such great amounts of communication and commitment were necessary. I'm just an introvert and all that's just wearing me out. I feel dismayed when he messages me because he can drag it on forever and I hate this type of thing.
I just didn't downgrade our relationship to friends again because I think maybe I could like him more if I'm with him, so I'm thinking of waiting this quarantine to end to see how thinks work out and I don't regret anything. But all this communication and lovey-dovey talk is just terrible. What should I do?
Thanks for reading~~
@littleBeechwood2625
Does this man have the qualities that you look for, or want in a man that you'd like to be serious with now and later down the road? You're going to need to ask yourself this question in order to decide what to do with his friendship, and back-and-forth liking one another.
There is always a potential possibility that feelings can tank even a two-year friendship, and it will be sad if that is the case here because it would throw away what you've both built over time. However, it may actually be a healthy thing for you too. Will you both be able to handle when things change and you're both in committed relationships down the road?
Great amounts of communication and commitment are some of the cornerstones of a great relationship. Regardless of what type of relationship you both share, it does seem to me that you both have a huge problem just being upfront, honest, and even blunt about what you both think, want, and feel for one another. You can opt to change that, or not, but your decision will certainly impact the long term outcome.
No need to lead him on. If you have zero intentions, he needs to know that and he then should step-off from the "lovey-dovey" talk. He will need to realize that if he continues with such talk, dragging it out, it will only erode what you both share faster - if your intent is to keep him as a friend.
Best of Luck!
