my ex and i broke up but we talk almost everyday

I've been having a lot of things with my relationship stress with someone I love. We broke up a month ago, because he felt like a tool, and that I wasn't treating him right, and I honestly felt like I wasn't, but I still love him and I've been wanting to make myself a better person for myself and the chance of us getting back. We've had an on and off relationship for 2 years. I was taking time recently even till now for myself to see how I was in the relationship and to be honest, I was very dependent and attached to him. I would always spam him, sometimes I wouldn't think about his feelings which really sucked that I didn't, I didn't love myself or take care of myself, so it ended up like him doing everything and trying. He was always trying to help me. He did a lot for me, he was always there for me, looked out for me, always spent time with me, and all of the things he could do to make me happy, and both of us happy. Even when we weren't together like during the on and off, he never left me, even till now, like he still cares, and talks to me, and I honestly still have feelings for him, but I just wanna at least do the right things which is to learn from my mistakes and I did. A lot of drama happened recently, but his family and I are okay now, like in good terms. I actually talked to his cousin, I sent her a message that I wanted to say to him, but I showed her to make sure it was good, and she thanked me for lightening his life, that I actually brightened up his days, and that if we do get together then she wouldn't mind me as a cousin-in-law. Him and I have talked recently, and I kinda asked him some things to see if he still does have feelings, we had this poem thing that we had to recite and him and I did it together and like after rehearsals, he said I did well and that I shouldn't worry about how I did, I asked him if he misses hearing from me and he said he does, he replied cute to a picture of when I was younger, and the message I sent him that I sent to his cousin, he seemed happy, and he thanked me, and told me to take care of myself as well.