Catholic and Evangelical as a couple ?
Hello, I have a question regarding me and my girlfriend. I am catholic and she is evangelical and she is telling me that if I don’t change to be like her God will not approve us to get married. Any comments on this? Thank you.
@djmelou I guess this talk should have been done near the start of the relationship. I mean one of you would of had to change your beliefs, to be a married couple. I think you both need to sit down and be truthful to each other about what the future is gonna be like if you stay together😥 I know it's sad, I'm sorry sweetie 😥
I agree with Tiny
@djmelou It is NOT appropriate for her to make you convert. That is manipulative behavior. Sorry. But I'm calling it out for what it is. She isn't the right one for you if she can't handle your beliefs.
@djmelou another consideration that has not been mentioned is children. A close friend married someone of the Catholic faith and they had to go through pre-marriage classes and promise to raise the kids Catholic. Your girlfriend does not sound open to that.
I think what is happening is you are getting an ultimatum. I personally find those to be the way true believers work: "It is my way or the highway" is essentially what they are saying. This is not a one off "okay I do this and everything will be fine."
The problem may seem immediate, but to me the problem is the long term consequences of being in a relationship with someone that imposes their will on you in a take it or leave it ultimatum. My fear is that even if you cave in and give up your church and convert to another church that is totally different from Catholocism, you may contintue to get your arm twisted every time there is a major decision. This is manipulation and possibly mind control.
Worst case scenario, this Evangelical church could be a cult or a church that keeps twisting your arm to get more money from you and your prospective wife.
I think that your fiance is highly manipulative to wait until now to tell you that you have to change religions or she is being manipulated by the church to try to keep her as a member and do not want to risk losing her.
To me this is less a question about religiion and more about if you want to submit to manipulation and be dominated by another person who will probably continute to manipulate you as long as you are with them.
You should consider this too @djmelou
@djmelou
@soulsings & @ScorpiaD pretty much laid it down for you...they're telling it like it is. There's nothing else I can add of that much substance.
If I were in a relationship with a woman & she told me I had to join her church in order to be with her, my only answer would be "adios, palomita" before I walk out the front door.
