Messing up
Sometimes ill make the smallest mistakes, and it will bother me for so long. The other day I had to attend an event where I won an award, but because they didnt prepare me for it, I didnt know whereI was supposed to stand on stage, and stood in the wrong place, even after someone told me where to go. Even if its something small, that ruined the whole thing for me, and I thought more about how I messed up than the award I won. It's not just that, but similar experiences where my anxiety or my tendency to comprehend things differently lead to misunderstandings or little embarrassing situations haunt me so much its exhausting. Usually when one thing happens ill spiral and remember other incidents, and fall into a loop of hating myself.
Logically I know its a small moment most will forget, and a moment that doesnt define me or anythingbut my brain cant accept that.
@hhhhhh04
I get it. Stuff like that sticks way harder in your own head than it does for anyone else.
You’re up there winning an award, and instead of getting to enjoy it, you’re stuck replaying the one part that felt off. And once your mind starts pulling up every other moment like that, it gets exhausting fast.
You’re not weird for feeling that way. Those little slips hurt way harder inside than they look on the outside.